


Heaven & Hell

by bogsheep



Category: Original Work
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Anxiety Disorder, Autism, Bisexuality, Blasphemy, Borderline Personality Disorder, Canon Autistic Character, Child Abuse, Child Soldiers, Depression, Drug Use, Eventual Happy Ending, F/F, Fantasy, Flashbacks, Heaven & Hell, Hurt/Comfort, I mean.... they fight a war.... people die......, I promise, IM SORRY FOR ALL THE VERY BAD STUFF I SWEAR ITSNOTALLSAD, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Murder, Non-Sexual Slavery, Other, Panic Attacks, Past Torture, Physical Abuse, Polyamory, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, ROCK N ROLL BUCKAROO, Recreational Drug Use, Revolution, Slavery, War, cause divines dont have gender babey!, characters that arent poc but are poc-coded, divine beings that are horny, im gettin the trigger warnings out of the way first Be Carefull!!!!, itsa yikes, ok now . not sad tags, on my part, this shit. gay, tyeres no cis or het ppl in this lmao, yall aint ready for this......
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-08-10
Packaged: 2020-04-23 14:35:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 22
Words: 25,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19153021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bogsheep/pseuds/bogsheep
Summary: The universe started 13 billion years ago. Not that the beings that are alive have been keeping track.No, the angels have been quite busy since the world started anew. Because this wasn't the first time there had been a Big Bang. They had been busy with things like love, drinking, praying, and preparing for when they all eventually had to find out what they were destined to be- angel, demon, reaper, etc.Only, Lucifer never anticipated Falling.Now, given a kingdom she never wanted and ripped away from the only family she's ever cared for, Lucifer is all ready for eternity- one problem, though.Her father, the worst person ever, has taken over control despite rhe fact he should have moved on to the Afterlife by now. And he has sinister plans for the new universe.Lucifer didn't anticipate sparking a revolt or being a hero. She never wanted all this responsibility. But she is nothing if not stubborn with nothing to lose- except a cute demon, a stressed Reaper, a scheming angel, and, you know, the War. But that's all fine.Lucifer never anticipated being important to anyone. She didn't even anticipate living this long. But the Ancestors have a funny way of screwing her over. Oh well.





	1. I - Part I; Morning Star

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOO *HAND CLAP* 
> 
> FOLKS!
> 
> I hope yall enjoy this cause this is Literally my special interest lmao
> 
> also I linked my enochian dictionary cause I'm ridiculous sorry boys!
> 
> uhhhhh I rlly hope this is good cause i originally wrote this chapter months ago hhhhhhrph but my friend said it was so??? HERE WE GO
> 
> hope yall folks are ready for some gay bullshit cause BOY OH BOY!!!

[glossary for terms](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1H46Z_3GeOUXQ0D-5yJ8_oRjSWVtp-b6iBt3B5aJ74IU/edit?usp=drivesdk)

* * *

 

“Your Highness!”

“Princess- good luck!”

“It’s going to go well, Princess! You’ll see!”

“You’ll be an excellent Nalo!”

“Thank you! I hope I will serve you all well.”

The young princess continued her run, smiling and waving as people shouted out more congratulatory phrases. _A little premature,_ she thought.

Leaping up, two large sets of feathered wings exploded from her back, carrying her into the sky with a few flaps. Someone cheered from the soft white ground below, but the princess simply continued on her path, bare feet grazing the tops of three buildings as the breeze blew back her hair. It wasn’t long before a larger house appeared, a small castle.

Smiling, she landed a few feet from the huge doors, all four wings folding neatly against her back and disappearing. She took a few small steps towards the staircase leading up to the castle, but before she even got close, a short, portly angel flung the doors open, launching herself down the stairs and into the princess’s arms.

“Lucifer! You finally made it!”

Lucifer laughed, holding her friend tightly. Setting her down, she ruffled the fluffy mess of hair that the younger had. The angel only just reached her shoulders, but stood tall and proud against her friend as if they were the same height.

“Yes! And we should hurry along,” she looked off into the distance, seeing a growing crowd of white and gold. “It’s gonna start soon, and I wanna be able to see everyone go up. C’mon, Moz!”

Taking off into the air once more, Moz was quick to follow, though not as quick as Lucifer. Lucifer laughed as she looked behind her, her friend struggling to keep up.

“It’s not fair!” Moz complained loudly. “You have four wings, you’re too fast!”

"I can't help it if you are simply too lazy to keep pace."

“Oh, fuck you!"

“Hey!" Lucifer twisted around mid-air, mock offended. "I could be your future leader, show some respect!

"And here I was thinking you didn't even want that." Moz mumbled as she followed Lucifer through low-hanging clouds. Lucifer bit her lip, trying not to let her friend's words get to her. It was true, the responsibility of ruling Heaven- really ruling- sent a shiver down her spine, but she had been trying her damn best to ignore that. Lucifer supposed she was quickly running out of time to ignore it, however, seeing as today was the day she would find out just how fucked she was on that issue.

Throwing the thoughts out of her mind, she made her way over to the crowd- Moz coming shortly after, cursing loudly. They floated above the crowd, which is was forming into a huge circle. In the center was a pedestal, and though there was nothing else in the way, everyone seemed to collectively decide to stand quite a few feet away from it.

Lucifer spied her sister in the crowd, and dove down. Some people cheered- Lucifer waved politely, as she landed. Angels yelled at her, mostly saying the same things as before, and Lucifer tuned them out with the type of ease only someone who grew up in the public eye could do.

“Lucifer.” Michael's voice was simple and emotionless, but her sister’s trained eye could detect a glimmer in her eyes and a twitch her lips. Lucifer smiles broadly in return.

“Michael, my favorite sister. Anything happen?”

Turning to look at the pedestal, she sighed. “Nothing so far, but it will be starting soon, no doubt. It's good you two finally arrived.” Michael let a small smile be revealed, one of her hands going to pet her younger sister’s hair gently. Lucifer preened at the affection.

“Hey, did you forget me already?” Moz, looking disgruntled, walked up to the pair. People moved out of her way, though they were significantly less interested in the young countess than they had been with Lucifer.

“I doubt I ever could, you're too loud."

Taking her hand, Lucifer waved goodbye to her sister as they made their way to another angel- tall, with long, straight hair.

“Apila!” The angel turned around, smiling joyfully at her friends.

“Lucifer, Moz! Are you two excited? I’m so excited, I can’t even imagine what’s going to happen- and Lucifer! You could be God! Of course, even if you aren’t God you’re gonna be-“ Lucifer silenced Apila by pressing a kiss to her lips. She giggled into it, pushing her away without any real effort put into it.

“Unfair, you haven’t kissed me once today.” Moz complained, crossing her arms. Lucifer giggled, turning to look at her old friend.

“Oh, how could I neglect you so?” She had to bend down to to look into Moz’s eyes.

“Maybe if you weren’t so short, I wouldn't." Moz glared at her before pulling her into a kiss. Lucifer faked shock, but before anything snarky could come out of her mouth, there was a collective gasp. Lucifer stood up and turned around, seeing a young angel- obviously a commoner, because Lucifer had never seen them before- step forward, towards the pedestal.

Everyone held their breath as they got closer and closer, until their hand was dipping into the bowl sitting on top of the pedestal and pulling out a small sheet of paper.

“Assistant to the High Countess!” Came the shrill voice, weak but loud enough for the crowd to hear. Light applause followed, as the angel walked back, bouncing along the way.

“It’s begun.” Lucifer said no one was in particular. Sending a glance over to her sister, who had now been joined by another- Ariel, the third eldest in their big family- she got a comforting smile in return.

Lucifer turned away and zoned out, thoughts racing through her head.

_Will I be crowned as God? Would Jesis? Can Jesis lead?_

_It had to be one of us, we are the only archangels. Why did there have to be two archangels? One would have been so much simpler. Everyone would have immediantly known who would be God._

_Could I even lead? I’m not any good at... most things. Especially at being a good person._

_Why did I have to be an archangel? Why couldn’t I be a normal angel like the rest of my family? Why me?_

_One of us has to lead, so hopefully Jesis. Because... I don’t want too. I just wanna stay here and be a princess. Serve my people as a member of the Royal family. Make out with cute girls._

_If Jesis becomes God, and I’m her uxor, what does that make me?_

“Luci! Look!”

Lucifer’s head snapped up, and caught the sight of Jesis. Walking towards the pedestal. Every angel was holding their breath, freezing into a sea of pale white statues.

Lucifer broke free of the trance, pushing her way through the crowd to the front.

Jesis was walking quickly, her hands clenched and shoulders tight. Her feet were moving faster than Lucifer’s eyes could track, almost tripping over herself to make it to the center. All of Eden’s- All of Heaven’s eyes were casted upon the young archangel.

When she reached the pedestal, not a soul was breathing. She moved in slow motion, her pale hands disappearing inside the bowl. Her eyes shut, face tensing with the anticipation of the moment. Her fingers locked onto a paper, bringing it up painfully slowly. She lifted it up and out, eyes closed as the other hand was raised up to hold the slip of paper straight. Eyes slowly blinking open, they scanned the words imprinted with extreme care, lips quietly repeating the sentence to herself. Finally, she turned, facing perfectly in Lucifer’s direction.

“I-I’m... God, and Nalo of Heaven.”

There was a moment of utter silence before every angel in Heaven screamed out in joy and excitement.

Lucifer stood, unaware of her own giant smile, as tears formed in her eyes and she felt waves of overwhelming energy crash into her, washing away fears and doubts and her gaze was just on Jesis, who taking in the entire scene, everyone cheering out with happiness. Finally, she began walking over to Lucifer. Before she could reach, Lucifer ran out, picking her uxor up with ease and swinging her around. The citizens laughed and cheered again for the couple. The pair unfurled their wings, four sets of bright, huge white wings glimmering in the daylight.

“I guess there’s no more mystery, huh?” Lucifer jokes, brushing some of Jesis’ loose, curly hair from her face. Jesis blushed, holding Lucifer’s hands tightly, kissing them gently.

“No, I suppose not.” She said, glowing with pride as she began to guide Lucifer back to the crowd. Behind them, another angel had begun to walk up, but  they went mostly unnoticed as the angels of the crowd were still celebrating the reveal of their Empress.

“So, how does it feel to be bonded to the Empress?” Moz teased, looking at the approaching couple, who laughed in response.

“Pretty fucking good, Moz.” Lucifer squeezed her hand, three angels went up and back, receiving slips of paper. The crowd bowed for Lucifer and for Jesis.

“Your Majesty!” Michael and the rest of the family hurried along, bowing deeply for the new Empress.

“Congratulations, Jesis- uh, Your Majesty-“ Ariel stuttered, high and sweet voice blushing as she looked at Jesis.

“I'm bonded to your sibling, Princess- Jesis is fine.” She responded, grinning.

“Yeah!” The three youngest siblings- Gabriel, Raphael and Sariel- approached Jesis, eyes full of awe as they looked at the new leader. Gabriel was the oldest, but still only reached about Ariel’s hip- and Raphael and Sariel were tiny, wings still awkward and unstable when they tried to fly. They were twins, the only difference being their respective haircuts. Lucifer smiled at her family, and bent down to pick up the two young twins.

“Well, I am sure that you will make a wonderful leader.” Michael gave Jesis a rare, controlled smile. Gabriel beamed up at Lucifer, eyes full of wonder. “Luci! Luci!” She yelled, waving her hands up to grab her attention. Lucifer bent down to get on eye level- or, as close to eye level as she could, being one of the tallest angels in Eden. “Luci,” Gabriel started, smiling widely at her sister. "Are you not moving away now? Cause you arent the...the..."

“Since you aren't God?” Jesis chimed, placing a hand on her uxor’s shoulder. Lucifer chuckled.

“Of course, Gabi. I’m not changing just because Jesis is the Empress.” Gabriel seemed happy with that answer, as she leaped forward to hug Lucifer.

The twins hopped down and out of Lucifer’s arms, allowing her to lift Gabriel into the air and swing her around. Gabriel cheered, whining a bit when Lucifer set her down. Lucifer laughed and began to say something, a witty joke or comment, when there was a deep twist in her chest, like an anchor latching into her heart and pulling her sideways, to the pedestal.

The world around her blurred, words slurring and becoming a nebulous haze around her as the pedestal sharpened in her mind, until it become the only clear imagine around her. The anchor heaved, her feet being pulled almost painfully toward it. Perhaps she ran into a few angels- the sensation in her chest, the feeling of a rope wrapped around her soul, pulling her closer and closer blocked out every other feeling. Her feet couldn’t seem to move fast enough, tripping over themselves to make it to the beacon of destiny in the center of the crowd.

She felt the cool, smooth stone of the pedestal- she wasn’t even aware she had reached it. Running a hand gentle across the edge, the inside made her vision sway. A dark hole was in the center- despite the clarity of the surrounding stone, the center of the bowl seemed blurry and vague, even inspiring fear in Lucifer’s heart. Her pale hand dipped down, sliding slowly and lightly until it, too, was hazy and unclear to even Lucifer. She took in a breathe, suddenly realizing that in her trance, she had barely breathed. Her body ached, and yet her hand still moved so slowly- a surprising difference to how her feet had moved moments before.

Her fingers suddenly felt the touch of paper, and she latched into it as quickly as possible. She brought it up in the same fashion, until it was nearing her face. The feeling of awe and terror swarmed her- in her hands, the declaration of who she would be and what she would be. It would decide her life.

A shaky breathe escaping her, she carefully grasped the paper with another shaky hand, holding it straight in front of her eyes to read.

In pitch black against stark white, was the inscription,

**_DEVIL, NAHIMI OF HELL._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmm. funky!
> 
> also gabriel is supposed ro be around 13-15 n the twins are supposed to be 9-11 basically. time is fake so it's not exact


	2. II

The devil.

The devil.

The devil.

The words were there, but her mind hadn’t processed them.

The devil.

The angels were waiting.

Lucifer looked up, dazed. Working on instinct, she turned, locking eyes with her sister. Her beloved sister.

“I am...” She faltered.

“I am the Devil, Nahimi of Hell.”

No one spoke.

No one cheered.

Lucifer stared at her sister. She wanted to say “I’m sorry.” Jesis wasn’t anywhere. Who would tell her?

She walked. She kept walking. The shocked crowd parted like a sea, letting Lucifer pass through. A hand on her arm-

Moz.

“Luce. Luci. Lucifer!”

Her head turned on a dime, looking at the concerned smaller angel. She looked so lost, so unsure. Lucifer wanted to apologize.

“Stay safe, o-okay? And write. Please?”

Lucifer nodded. She should apologize. Michael grabbed her shoulders.

Lucifer looked her in the eyes.

_I’m sorry._

“Sister, are you okay? Will you be okay? Please, be safe, write to me, and come visit me, and-“

Lucifer’s mind faded in and out.

_I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Michael, Moz, Jesis, Ariel, I’m so so so so sorry-_

“Why are you apologizing? Lucifer?”

Lucifer kept walking.

She kept walking.

She reached the edge of the City. The edge of Heaven.

Her eyes opened. Her mind cleared a bit. She didn’t look back, but her mind suddenly caught up, and she could think again.

“I’m... I’m the devil.”

Lucifer barely had time to think before it all turned to shit.

Her first thought was of her sister- she hoped, she prayed that Michael would visit her in Hell. Then of Moz and Jesis, because she loved them- she needed her friends to visit, or at the very least, write. She almost screamed, or broke down, when she thought of her childhood home. A place she hated but loved entirely. She almost got scared, but the scared thoughts were barely bubbling up before she took a step forward and everything-

Everything went white.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ah yes the plot is moving


	3. III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is very abstract but I literally didnt feel like I could describe it without? being abstract? So there

Fire.

FIRE.

FIRE. FIRE.

BURNING.

Nothing existed.

RED HOT.

PAIN.

Her mind was bleeding.

FLAMES.

SEARING HOT, SCORCHING.

Her eyes stared into the universe.

KILL ME KILL ME PLEASE.

Her voice was gone.

It’s was everywhere.

SOMEONE HELP.

FIRE.

FIRE.

The smell of smoke was choking her.

WINGS, MY WINGS, FIRE FIRE.

Her back felt like it was being ripped to shreds.

FLAMES.

BURNING.

FIRE.

SMOKE.

LIGHT.

STARS.

FIRE.

Her body was made of fire.

FIRE.

She was fire.

FIRE.

She didn’t breathe.

FIRE.

Is this what dying feels like?

FIRE.

Her body belonged to the fire.

FIRE.

She wanted to die.

FIRE

She wasn’t sure she had the choice anymore.

HELL.

She landed.


	4. IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw bodily horror (it's not explicit but heavily implied ig)

Lucifer opened her eyes for the first time in years. Or maybe it was seconds.

Pain shot through her. Her face was on a hot ground, harsh and made of stone. It was red. Everything was red.

There was a crack, then another.

Her wings felt like they were imploding.

She didn’t know if she screamed, she couldn’t seem to hear it, but she assumed she did. Her eyes were hot. Was she crying?

Her wings were so hot.

Lucifer had to be dying.

No, she thought. This is too painful to be death. It must be something worse.

What did she do? Why was this happening?

She didn’t finish that thought. Her head was cracked open.

Or, it must have been. Her head must be cracked open because pure white-hot agony was rattling every single piece of flesh. Her vision was white, then had black spots all over it. She might have passed out. Lucifer didn’t know.

Red again.

She lifts herself onto her forearms. She takes a deep breathe, and then there’s fire in her mouth, and her throat, and it fills her until she doesn’t know if she is anything else. When it pauses, she feels herself vomit, which part of her knows shouldn't be possible but there’s nothing but blood on the ground. Her wings flare out. Vaguely, she hears a scream. It sounds terrible.

Is that her?

She feels blood. It’s hot. Everything is hot. Too hot.

She gets up. Her legs feel like bricks.

She steps forward. Her jaw opens, but if anything comes out, it’s muted by pain. Her teeth feel like their melting off, and something sharp is pricking her lips.

Her wings flap. Something very, very wrong with them.

Red is everywhere. She doesn’t know where’s she going.

Air. She’s flying.

Red is still surrounding her.

Her hands feel hot, but less of a painful hot. It almost feels good.

She wants to cut off her hands.

She screams. It’s dull but there.

She does it again.

She can almost hear it fully. She screams.

She screams.

She screams.

In Hell, Lucifer Callidus Callistratus is screaming.

She is bloody. She is red. She has horns. She has wings stretched with skin, red and thin and without a single feather.

She is the Devil, and she screams again.


	5. V

Lucifer’s eyes open up. Something soft is beneath her. Air blows gently on her face.

Above her, there is red.

Funny. Normally it’s white.

She pushes herself up. She swings her legs over the bed. She looks down and her body.

She sees red.

The world crumbles apart.

She screams. She scratches. She tears at the reddened, heated skin.

At one point, she falls asleep.

Then Lucifer’s eyes open up. Something soft is beneath her. Air blows gently on her face.

It seems to never end.

She wakes up, and for a few blissful seconds, is merely confused. Voices come and go, a million miles away. Soft, beautifully cold hands push her down and she fights back, but without clear vision, she ends up submitting and falling back down. The voice, voices, try to be comforting, but she can’t hear it’s words. Eventually, it leaves. She sleeps. She wakes up, too.

She sees red. She screams. Her world is burning. Everything is burning.

Everything is burning.

Everything is-

Lucifer’s eyes open up. There is something soft beneath her. Air blows gently on her face. She sees her reddened, heated skin. She releases a small sob from her throat.

She doesn’t feel tears, at first, she just makes this choked sound. She feels lukewarm drops run down her face.

She tries to find a mirror. There isn’t one,  not in the small, simple room she’s in. The red walls, red bedsheet that has dark stains that seemed to be blood. The red pillow. She seemed to fit in uncomfortably in this room.

She gets up, her legs shaky but working. The door is locked, but the more she shakes the handle the more it turns. She can see her hand, red like her legs, and she can see her red wrist and even her red arm. She shakes the handle more, increasingly desperately. There is a click in the handle.

The door swings open. Lucifer takes one step out.

The first thing in the hallway is a mirror.

In the mirror is a demon.

That demon is Lucifer Callidus Callistratus.


	6. VI

Lucifer gently puts a hand to her jaw. It’s still the same, it feels the same, but it’s also red and rough. Her cheeks and jaw are still sharp, her face all edges. Her hair, which used to be stark white, is dark, like dried blood. She steps back, stretching out her broad shoulders. She sees her muscular arms, large chest hidden underneath a boxy brown dress. Lifting it up, she examines her body- it hasn’t changed much, physically. She squeezes the fat on her stomach, examining her hips for any sign of her long-hidden scars. She must have reapplied her glamour at some point, or someone else did, because they aren’t anywhere to be seen. All that there is, is red skin, red curves. Lucifer isn’t sure how she feels about this, but she isn’t happy. She looks at her eyes. Her eyes.

Those irises, they were supposed to be light, a blue-green mix. Blue like her mother, green like-

They are brown, now. Or, more accurately, a dark mahogany red. She is not like her mother anymore.

She bares her teeth, revealing sharpened canines. She lifts her lip with a finger, examining the long tooth. They could rip flesh, she considers. Like a monster.

Lucifer gently puts a hand to her jaw. It’s still the same, it feels the same, but it’s also red and rough. Her cheeks and jaw are still sharp, her face all edges. Her hair, which used to be stark white, is dark, like dried blood. She steps back, stretching out her broad shoulders. She sees her muscular arms, large chest hidden underneath a boxy brown dress. Lifting it up, she examines her body- it hasn’t changed much, physically. She squeezes the fat on her stomach, examining her hips for any sign of her long-hidden scars. She must have reapplied her glamour at some point, or someone else did, because they aren’t anywhere to be seen. All that there is, is red skin, red curves. Lucifer isn’t sure how she feels about this, but she isn’t happy. She looks at her eyes.

Her eyes. Those irises, they were supposed to be light, a blue-green mix. Blue like her mother, green like-

They are brown, now. Or, more accurately, a dark mahogany red. She is not like her mother anymore.

She bares her teeth, revealing sharpened canines. She lifts her lip with a finger, examining the long tooth. They could rip flesh, she considers. Like a monster.

Lucifer gently puts a hand to her jaw. It’s still the same, it feels the same, but it’s also red and rough. Her cheeks and jaw are still sharp, her face all edges. Her hair, which used to be stark white, is dark, like dried blood. She steps back, stretching out her broad shoulders. She sees her muscular arms, large chest hidden underneath a boxy brown dress. Lifting it up, she examines her body- it hasn’t changed much, physically. She squeezes the fat on her stomach, examining her hips for any sign of her long-hidden scars. She must have reapplied her glamour at some point, or someone else did, because they aren’t anywhere to be seen. All that there is, is red skin, red curves. Lucifer isn’t sure how she feels about this, but she isn’t happy. She looks at her eyes.

Her eyes. Those irises, they were supposed to be light, a blue-green mix. Blue like her mother, green like-

They are brown, now. Or, more accurately, a dark mahogany red. She is not like her mother anymore.

She bares her teeth, revealing sharpened canines. She lifts her lip with a finger, examining the long tooth. They could rip flesh, she considers. Like a monster.

_Like a monster._

Lucifer grabs onto one of two horns that have grown on the sides of her head. Vaguely she remembers a splitting pain, feeling like her head was open. That must have been it. One, the right horn, is covered partly by the blood-colored hair that still flows all the way down to her chin. The other is completely exposed, all the hair on that side still shaved off. She runs a finger down the smooth, currant-colored sculpture, it’s color going from dark to light. Tapping the very tip, she can feel how sharp they are.

Lucifer doesn’t understand why she feels so muted. She’s numb. Though, after who knows how long of her screaming and crying, she supposes her brain is finally processing what is happening. What she’s lost. What she’s gained. Lucifer feels... she feels...

Lucifer feels disgusting. She should be white, and cold, and have a golden halo and two sets of fluffy white wings. Her eyes should be light and blue-green, her hair pearly white, her skin porcelain.

Lucifer is disgusting. She is red, and burning hot, and she has two sharp horns sprouting out like horrible trees and one pair of wings, not soft or feathered, but with long bones and thin skin connecting it. Her eyes like a swirling, dark and terrifying depth. Her hair looks like old blood, cracking and dried, her skin like blood freshly spilt from an innocent body.

This is not right, she thinks. Part of her knows it is- she remembers the pedestal, the paper. She is the Devil. This is right.

_But I don’t want it to be._

With a heavy sigh, Lucifer turns and looks down the long, empty hallway. Plants and doors are lining the walls, but there isn’t a soul in the building, it seems.

_How did I get here?_

Taking a couple steps to the left, her hand glides across the walls. Everything is red in Hell, it seems. Everything is in shades of crimson, including her. It’s fitting, though, since everything is white in Heaven.

She misses Heaven.

Through one door, she hears talking.

“-and just never stops screaming! What if she’s broken? Do you think she’ll ever be able to think again?”

She almost remembers that voice. It’s familiar, but she can’t put a face to the smooth sounds.

“I haven’t heard her yell in a while.”

That one, too. Who are they? She hits her head with a hand, trying to clear the fog from her mind.

“She could be sleeping, still.”

“Normally she’s up by now.”

“I’ll go check on her. I’m gonna try not to wake her up, though.  She needs all the rest-“ The sentence is stopped by the door opening, and Lucifer is face-to-face with a mottled black-and-white figure.

The figure looks at her, shocked.

Suddenly, Lucifer remembers the face and voice. How could she forget?

“Azrael?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHH YES YEEHAW AZRAEL HAS ARRIVED BOYS!!


	7. VII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dont like this chapter that much but hhhh ya gotta get thru this n the next one before Plot Occurs

Last time Lucifer checked, Azrael was pure white, like every other angel. When Jesis had introduced the two, that’s what Lucifer had seen. But now, her short, curly hair was a deep black, with splotches all over her face. White gaps surrounded her eyes and nose, with lines splattered across those dark lips. Her dress was black, too, and it reveal her body enough for Lucifer to learn that the rest of her was a dark black. Lucifer was surprised by this, shocked even, but obviously not as much as Azrael was surprised to see her.

Lucifer looked at her in the eyes- eyes that used to be a pale yet deep blue, but were now like two pieces of charcoal- and cocked her head to the side.

“Azi, what happened to your face? Aren’t you an angel? Did you fall too?” Her voice was rough and scratchy.

“Is that Lucifer?”

Behind Azrael, Lucifer recognizes her lover. Jesis stood, bearing a dramatic new dress that was made of a smooth silk, falling gracefully to the floor with a lace-lined cape falling behind, still an angel. Lucifer was unbearably jealous, at this but she still burned with curiosity- and other things- to find out the explanation behind Azrael.

“Jesi, what happened to Azrael?”

Jesis pushed Azrael to the side, hugging Lucifer tightly. Lucifer shivered when their skins touched, the skinnier deity flushing at the heat.

“That’s not an answer, my love,” Lucifer chuckled.

When Jesis pulls back, she was crying. She seems happy to see Lucifer. Did she think she was dead? Perhaps Lucifer was, in some regard. It was an interesting notion.

“Jesis, are you ever going to answer me?”

She laughs, which sounds like honey to Lucifer after hearing nothing but screaming for days on end. Lucifer runs a hand through her soft hair- loose curls falling down her neck and resting gently on her shoulders, soft and white like precious cotton. She was a literal breathe of fresh, cool air.

_I love her._

“She’s... she’s the Niramala, my dear. She’s a Reaper now. Like...” her voice falters, looking anxious. Her eyes avoid Lucifer’s, looking instead at her bare feet.

“Like how I’m a demon?” Lucifer looks over at Azrael, who was still wide-eyes in shock.

“That’s cool, Azi. I guess you’re finally royalty.” Lucifer smiled at her own joke. Jesis blinks a few times, but Lucifer pushes past them and into the sitting room. Two elegant couches sit across from one another, a low table between them- red, which did not surprise Lucifer in the slightest. On the table, two untouched glasses. From the look of them, they were some type of wine. _Nice_.

“I see you two have been busy." She said, taking down one of the cups with ease, and holding the second one.

“Lucifer! What are you- don’t- what?” A chorus of confused half-question rises behind her. Lucifer turns around, cup in hand. She doesn’t understand their confusion, she drinks all the time. It’s not abnormal. What Lucifer wants to know is what’s happened while she was... momentarily incapacitated. Jesis and Azrael did not seem interested in telling her at that moment.

“Lucifer, sit down. You’ve just spent 12 days and nights in a state of shock.” Azrael gently guided her to one of the two soft couches, but Lucifer stopped her before sitting down.

“Wait,” she said, before wrapping her arms around Azrael and hugging her. She was the only person bigger than Lucifer in height or build. Azrael looked down, blushing a bit, and Lucifer chuckled at her friends pretty, confused face. The two sat down on the couch, Jesis across from them, clearing her throat.

“Now, Lucifer, it may be a shock to you, but,” her voice is eerily soft, and she fidgets in her spot, “You have... well, it's... you've changed quite a lot. You are... entirely different.” She doesn’t meet Lucifer’s eyes.

“I know that. I’m not an idiot, I looked in the mirror.” Jesis looks surprised, as if she thought Lucifer had managed to walk all the way there without having the slightest clue what she looked like. Lucifer turned to look at Azrael.

“You did realize there was an entire mirror across from my room, yes? Did you assume I wasn’t going to look at myself?” Azrael opened her mouth to defend them, but closed it, biting her lip.

“We... didn’t pay that much attention to the hallway,” she finally admitted.

Lucifer laughed for the first time in forever. It didn’t really feel like her laugh, but it was genuine.

“I see you both remain helpless without my guidance, as per usual. Good thing I’m back.” Lucifer took the other glass of wine and downed it. Jesis grabbed the cup from her hand, annoyed.

“Lucifer, stop joking! This is serious! You were- you were ill for a long time! You could have serious damages to your mind!”

Lucifer rolled her eyes. “I've been through quite a lot before this, Jesis. To say I “might” have damages to my mind is a severe understatement. I’m used to trauma by now. You may think all I want to talk about is myself- and that’s usually true- but I really desire to know what’s been happening while I’ve been gone.”

Jesis obviously hadn’t been expecting Lucifer to have her sardonic nature back so quickly, and was left speechless. Azrael was of much greater help, turning to face the demon with a stern face.

“Jesis has been appointed Nalo, and I, Niramala. I’ve been setting up my kingdom- there aren’t many reapers yet- and trying to take care of the demons in your... absence.”

Lucifer jumped up, suddenly concerned.

“The demons? How many? Are they expecting me?” A black hand pulled her back down gently.

“They are waiting for a proper coronation, yes. There are around 20 at this time. I’m sure they can wait a bit more-“ Lucifer was already making her way to the door, fast on her feet.

“No time!” She called behind her, slamming the door. Running into the first bedroom she saw, she tried looking through the closet for a proper dress, to no avail. Sighing, she tried another, and another. Slamming the door of Bedroom Number Five, she leans against the wall.

“How I am supposed to give a speech looking like this!" Lucifer exclaimed bitterly. Squeezes her hands into fists, she looks down at her clothing. Quickly she decides the strange brown dress- that was obviously made for patients- would not do for a Queen. Not when she needed to appear  _strong_ forthe new country.

A room farther down the hall slowly creaks open, drawing her attention. Walking slowly towards it, Lucifer peered inside. There was a closet, the door ajar.

“Nothing to lose,” Lucifer told herself, stepping inside.

She threw the closet open, revealing an elegant red dress. It was in a similar style to how Michael preferred her dresses, far more elegance and refinement than the drama Lucifer tended to go for, but that was more than fine.

For a moment, Lucifer paused. Her mind seemed to start to catch up, asking why there was a dress, or why the door opened, or what the hell she was going to say or how she was going to rule an entire damn country when she couldn't even handle herself- but Lucifer had always been good at compartmentalizing.

“Lucifer!” Azrael burst in, and Lucifer freezed in her spot, dress pooled around her feet, wearing nothing else. She smiled, eyebrows raised.

“Little privacy for the Devil, Azi?”

Azrael, blushing, backed out into the hallway.

Lucifer returned to her dressing, sliding into the dress. It fit her well enough, though a little loose, and she decided it would have to do. Exiting the room, she found Azrael and Jesus standing in the hallway, looking pensive and anxious. Jesis, upon noticing her return, walked over.

“Oh... wow.”

Lucifer was decked out, her dress falling to the floor in the back but revealing her legs in the front. It was made of many, many red layers, and it sparkled in the light that came from small torches lining the walls. The neckline dipped down gracefully, not revealing too much but still remaining enticing, while the short sleeves that small ruffles that were a signature of the Royalty in Heaven. The back was open, as was the usual for any clothing, so that one’s wings could be used at any time.

Jesis was trying to stay serious, as Lucifer needed to rest after all, but it was hard since she was grinning in that way that Jesis had grown to know much too well, the and her eyebrows were raised as she twisted and turned. Show off. Lucifer kept grinning.

“You really like it, don’t you, _pil jarima?_ ” She said, beginning to admire herself.

“Lucifer- stop that, pay attention!- Lucifer, you need to rest!” Azrael stepped forward, and Lucifer met her eyes, pouting her lips with her eyes wide in confusion. She looked so... like herself, her old self, that Jesis calmed down a little bit.

“Oh, Azi, darling,” she put a hand on Azrael’s shoulder, smiling softly, “I can’t leave them out there, leaderless. Look, I had a little breakdown-“

“A LITTLE?” Jesis yelled, stepping forward. Lucifer flinched back. “Lucifer, you never stopped screaming! You sobbed for- for days! DAYS! You should-“ Lucifer grabbed her shoulders, and pulled her into a rough kiss. Jesis melted, out of habit, as Lucifer was absolutely masterful at the art of kissing, but Lucifer drew back and she was suddenly very serious.

“Uxor, I have a duty. A job to do. I’m their Queen now. I cannot let them sit there, by themselves, lost and alone and scared. I cannot turn my back on people in need. And, if you didn’t realize, they are my people now.” Lucifer stayed solemnly. With a small smile, she turned and strutted down the hall and to the door, and the two other leaders were left in the silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer is the master of repressing emotions & trauma. yall cant even SPELL repression!!!!


	8. VIII

The house, bless its heart- or, lack of one- led her to the front room. The fact that the house had some semblance of consciousness, or at least enough intelligence to listen, wasn’t to alarming- she had just changed species, it had been a long day, the semi-sentient building wasnt even that weird when it came to the stories Lucifer had read about.

The room was massive, with doors and stairs- so nothing she wasn’t used to at home- or, what used to be home. Walking through, chandelier above her, and elegant staircases on either side, she mentally prepared herself for this. She had always been good at improv, so... good for her and them.

Pushing through the doors, she was greeted with a wave of heat. It filled her nose and mouth and wow, Hell was hot. Damn hot. And yet, Lucifer wasnt even bothered by it.

Guess that’s the benefit of being the Devil.

There was a long staircase at her feet, and to her right was a lot of red, jagged stone. Red jagged stones, it seemed, made up most of Hell’s territory, which was much different to the vast, cold land that she used to reside in. She had exchanged the huge fields of empty, white wind and snow for heated ravines and cliffs-

“Aha!” Lucifer exclaimed to herself. On her right, there was a path leading up to a huge cliff that overlooked the rest of Hell.

Walking towards it, she realized that this path was, in fact, very sharp and slanted. Yikes. Not that Lucifer would terribly mind climbing, but she preferred to keep her feet clean of blood for speeches. Her attention was soon drawn to a hole in the wall, which, as she entered, appeared to be a non-dangerous path upwards.

Lucifer had nothing to lose but- well, her life, but,... eh. She began walking up, and after a few short minutes, arrived at the top of the cliff.

Hell was... strange. It seemed to wrap around the cliff, with a small section beginning it- starting with her castle- and going out, and Lucifer could see it expand as it continued. There were some huts and people, milling around, which made guilt immediately begin festering in her heart.

She had left them, her subjects, without a ruler. They were alone, lost, without direction. How selfish could she be? She hit her head against the wall in anger, before walking farther out to get a better view. She had only just begun to see how the valley had started wrapping around the cliff and going off into different directions when-

“Hey! She’s awake!”

Immediately, a crowd began gathering below her. There must have been at least a hundred, maybe two hundred demons. All of them, red and nervous, eyes full of excitement and curiosity as they gazed upon their new leader.

The house, bless its heart- or, lack of one- led her to the front room. The fact that the house had some semblance of consciousness, or at least enough intelligence to listen, wasn’t to alarming- she had just changed species, it had been a long day, the semi-sentient building wasnt even that weird when it came to the stories Lucifer had read about.

The room was massive, with doors and stairs- so nothing she wasn’t used to at home- or, what used to be home. Walking through, chandelier above her, and elegant staircases on either side, she mentally prepared herself for this. She had always been good at improv, so... good for her and them.

Pushing through the doors, she was greeted with a wave of heat. It filled her nose and mouth and wow, Hell was hot. Damn hot. And yet, Lucifer wasnt even bothered by it.

_Guess that’s the benefit of being the Devil._

There was a long staircase at her feet, and to her right was a lot of red, jagged stone. Red jagged stones, it seemed, made up most of Hell’s territory, which was much different to the vast, cold land that she used to reside in. She had exchanged the huge fields of empty, white wind and snow for heated ravines and cliffs-

“Aha!” Lucifer exclaimed to herself. On her right, there was a path leading up to a huge cliff that overlooked the rest of Hell.

Walking towards it, she realized that this path was, in fact, very sharp and slanted. Yikes. Not that Lucifer would terribly mind climbing, but she preferred to keep her feet clean of blood for speeches. Her attention was soon drawn to a hole in the wall, which, as she entered, appeared to be a non-dangerous path upwards.

Lucifer had nothing to lose but- well, her life, but,... eh. She began walking up, and after a few short minutes, arrived at the top of the cliff.

Hell was... strange. It seemed to wrap around the cliff, with a small section beginning it- starting with her castle- and going out, and Lucifer could see it expand as it continued. There were some huts and people, milling around, which made guilt immediately begin festering in her heart.

She had left them, her subjects, without a ruler. They were alone, lost, without direction. How selfish could she be? She hit her head against the wall in anger, before walking farther out to get a better view. She had only just begun to see how the valley had started wrapping around the cliff and going off into different directions when-

“Hey! She’s awake!”

Immediately, a crowd began gathering below her. There must have been at least a hundred, maybe two hundred demons. All of them, red and nervous, eyes full of excitement and curiosity as they gazed upon their new leader.

_Well, no time like the present._

“Demons of Hell!” She announced to the crowd, “I am P- Lucifer Callidus Callistratus!” She cursed herself for almost saying “Princess.” It wasnt in true, she was still a princess- but that title was a heavy reminder of what she had just lost. Now was not the time.

“I apologize most deeply for my absence- and for leaving you all without a leader. But the time has come, and I must be crowned now, so that we may work together to build up Hell, into a beautiful society that every world shall be envious of! I may lead us there, but it will be you, the fine citizens of Hell, that will make it so glorious. With fine work and perseverance, we can do it!”

A few demons clapped, then another few, then one cheered, and soon everyone was clapping and cheering her. Lucifer grinned, reveling in their appreciation and excitement.

Raising a hand, she asked for their silence. They obeyed swiftly, though eager to hear the next words from their leader.

“I, Lucifer Callidus Callistratus, former High Princess of the Royal Family Callidus Callistratus, humbly accept the role of Nahimi of Hell. I promise- no, swear to do my very best, use all of my strength, power and potential to bring glory to my people and justice to any and all creations able to make evil decisions created. My first priority will be the universe’s safety, my second my people’s. And, if this is a suitable declaration, then please, Ancestors of Ancestors, allow me to be crowned.”

Hands extended, Lucifer closed her eyes and prayed. To her mother, her grandmother, her grandmother’s mother, and every generation afterwards. She felt a tingling sensation fill her hands, and when her eyes opened-

A golden crown sat, perfectly placed, in her open palms. It had two holes- she assumed for her horns- and three horns in the center. It had a single star on the forehead, and a sliver of gold that would go down onto her nose. Raising it up, she placed it on her own head with poise she had gathered from her lifetime as royalty. She didn’t even recognize th fact that she was being cheered loudly for until a few seconds afterwards.

“All hail Her Majesty, the Royal Queen of Hell, Lucifer Callidus Callistratus!” One shouted, then they all screamed out their approval.

Lucifer glowed, and a warmth filled her heart- one that reminded her that she was now Hell, the physical embodiment of the fires of the realm. In her body, like a treasure chest, she held the flames of the people and their new home.

Despite all that happened, Lucifer made a promise that she would never, ever leave them alone again- she would die for these people.

She was a Queen now. She would act like it.

, no time like the present!

“Demons of Hell!” She announced to the crowd, “I am P- Lucifer Callidus Callistratus!” She cursed herself for almost saying “Princess.” It wasnt in true, she was still a princess- but that title was a heavy reminder of what she had just lost. Now was not the time.

“I apologize most deeply for my absence- and for leaving you all without a leader. But the time has come, and I must be crowned now, so that we may work together to build up Hell, into a beautiful society that every world shall be envious of! I may lead us there, but it will be you, the fine citizens of Hell, that will make it so glorious. With fine work and perseverance, we can do it!”

A few demons clapped, then another few, then one cheered, and soon everyone was clapping and cheering her. Lucifer grinned, reveling in their appreciation and excitement.

Raising a hand, she asked for their silence. They obeyed swiftly, though eager to hear the next words from their leader.

“I, Lucifer Callidus Callistratus, former High Princess of the Royal Family Callidus Callistratus, humbly accept the role of Nahimi of Hell. I promise- no, _swear_ to do my very best, use all of my strength, power and potential to bring glory to my people and justice to any and all creations able to make evil decisions created. My first priority will be the universe’s safety, my second my people’s. And, if this is a suitable declaration, then please, Ancestors of Ancestors, allow me to be crowned.”

Hands extended, Lucifer closed her eyes and prayed. To her mother, her grandmother, her grandmother’s mother, and every generation afterwards. She felt a tingling sensation fill her hands, and when her eyes opened-

A golden crown sat, perfectly placed, in her open palms. It had two holes- she assumed for her horns- and three horns in the center. It had a single star on the forehead, and a sliver of gold that would go down onto her nose. Raising it up, she placed it on her own head with poise she had gathered from her lifetime as royalty. She didn’t even recognize th fact that she was being cheered loudly for until a few seconds afterwards.

“All hail Her Majesty, the Nahimi of Hell, Lucifer Callidus Callistratus!”

One shouted, then they all screamed out their approval. Lucifer glowed, and a warmth filled her heart- one that reminded her that she was now Hell, the physical embodiment of the fires of the realm. In her body, like a treasure chest, she held the flames of the people and their new home.

Despite all that happened, Lucifer made a promise that she would never, ever leave them alone again- she would die for these people.

She was a Queen now. She would act like it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and that's a wrap on this section! technically it's not even one of the main sections but it is the end of this. part of the story so we can move on to setting up the Plot ™


	9. IX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: Refrences to child. abuse, slavery and a flashback to child abuse. The scenes are marked, and feel free to skip them. I'll explain what happened in them at the bottom.

Around a year had passed, in Angelic terms, and Lucifer’s world had bursted.

Demons had swelled numbers to a thousand and counting. Agriculture was performing well, foods were being harvested and turned into delicious meals, and Lucifer had gotten the economy off to a good start. She was proud!

She should have been proud.

Lucifer was in somewhat of a depressive state as of late. Her heart was with Hell, but her mind with Heaven- it longed, painfully so, for her family, her sisters and friends, her homeland and her wife. It was all up, up high. She may have described her new experiences as selcouth, except they were less strange yet marvelous, and more strange and depressing.

The stars she had created, both with her birth and her magic, used to glimmer in the night, like a collage of brilliance splattered throughout the inky blue sky. The world was astriferous, overflowing with light and magic and the swelling belief in sabaism whenever the sky darkened.

Now, the only starlight she could see was from the opening in Hell’s roof where light from Heaven flooded in. In the giant cave-like world, the night sky was barely a fraction of what she knew.

Though she truly loved Hell, and it’s people, she had grown up in Heaven- and she had never wanted a crown that weighed so heavily with responsibilities. She was content to give it all to Jesis, to let her rule while Lucifer enjoyed a relaxing life of sex, fun, and love. Content to have her only responsibility be to keep Heaven safe and secure as a member of the Royal Family. Content to lead a life of goodwill and debauchery.

But now she had a promise to keep. Lucifer would not break that promise, ever. Even if it cost the Queen her life.

Perhaps if it were just this, she could force up some good feelings, an honest smile to two. But there was something else, a much bigger problem that filled her with dread unimaginable.

Her father was back.

Cassius was an angel Lucifer could only describe as “the worst person she had and probably would ever know.”

* * *

 

Her memories led her back to the first day he began training her, simply taking her out into the white fields of the training grounds. She hadn’t expected the first blow- nor the glittering, golden knife that soon was mottled with her red blood. She screamed, she cried, so even tried pushing- but in the end, all she got was a bloody nose and several scars.

“First lesson,” he began, knife tracing Lucifer’s jaw. “Never get distracted. Not by your enemies, by pain, and _not_ ,” he pressed the sharp tip into her neck, blood bubbling up and a few slipping down, “by _fear_. Do you understand?”

Lucifer understood, better than any child should. She had been so, so young, and from that day forward her childhood was a patchwork of blood and pain and internalizing everything, until she was formed into a soldier. But the way that soldier was sculpted required slicing pieces off until it was unrecognizable. She wondered, on occasion, who she would be know if he hadn’t-

* * *

 

 _No,_ she thought,  _there’s no point in wondering when it would never have happened. I was always going to turn into this._

More importantly, her father had _left_. He had gone, to the _Dazi Nimalil Sov Audcal._  A sort of afterlife, where every generation before lives and watches and learns the truth, as her mother had said. But you weren’t supposed to come _back._ And you were not supposed to guide the next generation.

His excuse- _his bullshit excuse,_ thought Lucifer- was that they’re progress was “too slow” and they would “guide the new angels, demons and reapers until I see fit to let them live alone.”

 _That fucking control freak,_ Lucifer thought, the image of his face turning her thoughts sour as her anger stewed inside her. Her hands burned, her magic rising up with her anger and bursting out in the form of flames on her hands. She quickly doused them, and internalized that information. Once she learned to control her newfound magic, she would explore it further.

She stood on the deck of her palace, and soon spotted the moving forms of gold- six Ancestors, sent by her father, who had come down to Hell to “monitor” Lucifer’s activities. If something was not up to her father’s standard, he would demand she change them.

The flames threatened to arise once more, her soul and body burning up with hate. But now was not the time for a fight- she had plans on that day.

She had not visited Heaven before then, not knowing exactly how and not feeling up to it. But she needed to discuss with Jesis about a possible trade opportunity that Lucifer had thought up at some late hour, and so she left her castle in the hands of her maids- ten demons that had come down after receiving the job of “servant to The Devil.” They were a nice bunch, if a bit jittery and nervous around Lucifer, as if she were some sort of wild animal that could lash out without morning. Though, that could be considered in apt description of the Queen in certain situations.

She followed the directions left by Jesis, saying following the path from her garden- a large expanse behind the castle that she had yet to do something with- until she found a tunnel that was filled with light.

She summoned a equem, a creature that looked similar to a what would inevitably be a horse. They were formed by magic, and though they had no other purpose besides transpiration, Lucifer had a fondness for them. She led hers, which was, like the rest of the creatures of Hell, made shades of red, to the exit of Hell. Recently she had taken to wearing shirts and pants more, as they seemed to be widely worn Hell. Hell seemingly had different, more diverse fashion that Heaven- more people wore pants, shorts, and shirts instead of just dresses. Lucifer had only ever worn such outfits for intense riding, but she had come to realize she quite enjoyed the new clothing. On that day, she had chosen a soft, flowing shirt, one without sleeves to show off her arms. Her pants were tight, as she liked, and had a sort of half-skirt around them, like a cape. It made her feel more regal. The variously dark shades of red fit in well in Hell, but she knew they would be extra bright in the white, flat plains of Heaven.

She swung a cloak around her, clicking the small gold clasps together. Satisfied with the outfit, she hopped on and rode up and up the tunnel, until the rocks faded into white and she felt a burst of cold air that brought tears to her eyes, because for the first time in her life, she was cold.

Angels didn’t feel cold, angels loved the cold. But demons were affected by every chill and breeze. Lucifer hated it, and she hated herself for letting a few tears escape. She wiped them away furiously, and continued on.

Finally, the cold fully enveloped her and she was in Heaven. Beautiful, wide-open Heaven. Despite her new weakness to the cold, she still enjoyed the familiar view.

She looked around, and spotted what appeared to be buildings far off. She hoped it was Eden, the capital where she grew up, and not some small town, but either way she needed to reach civilization. One could die if they got lost in Heaven’s fields, especially when a storm blew by.

Going into a full gallop, she rode as fast as she could. Lucifer watched as the buildings grew bigger and more sprung up, and she was comforted by the knowledge that it was, in fact, Eden.

After roughly thirty minutes, she reached the very edge of the city. She got off the equem, using her magic to form it into a small noso for later use. With a flick of her hand the noso disappeared into an astral pocket, and strolled into town, soon becoming aware of how visible she was.

Bright red on pure white, like a bloody wound. A problem, too obvious and obnoxious, a stain on the perfect wonderland of her hometown.

She didn’t belong there, and everyone knew it. She was an intruder.

Lucifer did not lower her head, because she could not afford to be seen as cowardly. She was royalty, regardless of her race or skin tone. As people whispered, shocked, she willfully ignored them and simply stared ahead, eyes like daggers. She was able to even feel proud of herself, but her mood dropped swiftly once more.

“Move it! Move it, you lazy bastard!”

Lucifer’s head spun to find the source of such language. Speeding up, she followed the sounds, soon running full speed until she passed all the restaurants and clubs and fancy places that the rich and royal members of Eden loved. She ran, cloak waving wildly behind her, until she recognized the modest houses of the civilians and she kept running, until she got to where they grew crops-

She stopped cold.

“Oh my lords.”

* * *

 

Angels, at least twenty, were in chained lines. The had farming tools in hand, but their shirtless backs were covered in blood as Ancestors whipped them aggressively. They swore at them, telling them to work faster and harder and better. Lucifer swayed where she stood, her mind filled with memories of her father yelling and slicing and punching her, blood splaying everywhere and her nose especially gushing, screaming at her that she was an idiot and horrible and a _fool_ and grabbing her hair and pounding her head into a wall until she was unconscious and forcing her down and-

Lucifer ran away.

She didn’t want to, but she was having one of those times where she started breathing rapidly and felt dizzy, and she couldn’t think at all. She was leaning against a shed wall, trying to regain the ability to breath and think as she cried and cried into her hand. Her body was wracked with sobs, her mind racing with terror.

 _Focus_!

She hit her head with her hand, over and over, until she took in a deep, shaky breath and felt order begin to return. She rubbed her wrist, nails dipping down into her skin to distract herself.  Her breathing steadied enough for her to push off the wall, and begin thinking once more.

* * *

 

“This can’t be real.” she told herself. “This has to be some sort of... mistake. A mistake!” Lucifer’s eyes filled with determination, and she got atop her equem to find Jesis.

 _She has to find out!_ Lucifer states in her mind.

This has to stop.

Now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First TW: Lucifer talks about how her father trained her to be a soldier from an extremely young age, teaching her to ignore pain and fear. He would attack her with a knife to train her reflexes and fighting abilities.
> 
> Second TW: Lucifer sees angels being worked as slaves in the fields, and has a panic attack. She gets a flashback and tries to calm down by hitting her head with her hands and scratching her arms.


	10. X

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jesis is dumbass on main: the chapter  
> btw I'm sorry this angel is so fuckin thick. just idiotic.

When Lucifer arrived at the castle, she fought to push down the wave of jealousy and nostalgia. The fact that Jesis still lives in Heaven, in a huge white castle, still an angel? It dug into Lucifer’s heart. Not that she’d ever confess to such feelings, especially not to Jesis.

With three knocks, the large doors were pulled inwards. A nervous-looking servant was on the inside, and they looked up with eyes the size of a moon at the domineering, red figure in on the other side.

“Oh-oh-“

“I’m Queen of Hell, Lucifer Callidus Callistratus. I demand to speak to the Empress,” Lucifer said, leaning in looking above the servant- and easy feat, as Lucifer towered over most beings- and tried to catch a glimpse of her uxor inside the entrance room.

“T-the Empress? Her-her Majesty is in the bath, I could-“ Lucifer pushed the door open, walking straight past the servant and into the huge castle. Large columns and carvings filled the room, and a chair on a pedestal that was adorned with gold. She began walking towards a staircase until the servant called after her.

“Y-your High-highness! You-you can’t- please, please don’t-“ they began, and Lucifer had to admit, they were just trying to do their job. They seemed young, perhaps young enough to have never had met Lucifer when she was still an angel.

“Believe me, Jesis will not terribly mind.” The staircase led into a long hallway, and as the demonic figure began strolling past countless pale doorways, a young handmaiden walked out of one with armfuls of towels. She ran directly into Lucifer, falling backwards with her towels flying across the hallway, one landing on her face. Lucifer chuckled, bending down to pick up the dropped towels and help her up.

“Oh, thank you-“ she looked up at Lucifer, and froze in place. Lucifer just smiled at her, knowing how people often reacted to a royal figure helping them. This certainly wasn’t the first time in her long life that this situation had occurred. “Y-your Highness! Thank you very, very much, Queen Lucifer.” She arose, taking back the towels from Lucifer. “Why, may I ask, do you grace the castle with your presence?”

“I was intending on finding my uxor and gracing her with my presence, but she seems to have evaded me so far. You haven’t seen her?” Perking up, the handmaiden pointed at a door adjacent from the one she came from.

“Oh! Her Majesty is in there, taking a bath. You can wait in the-“

“Thank you very much!” Lucifer walked past her, and pushing the door open eagerly. Jesis was, in fact, bathing in a large pool. She was deep in the milky water, her neck and collar exposed. Her eyes were closed, as a handmaiden gently cleans her arm, which was resting above water on the edge of the pool. Flowers and perfumes surround her, making the air smell comforting and cozy. Lucifer grinned brightly at the pure view of her lover, in a state of pure relaxation. The light of her halo was casting gold across her features. Jesis opened one eye, seeing Lucifer, causing a grin to form on her face. While her servants seemed shocked and alarmed, she was perfectly calm.

“ _Pil nimasa,_ my dear. What a pleasure it is to see you, here, in my bathing room, with me, naked.” Jesis waved her hand, beckoning Lucifer over to the side of the pool, where she crouched down. The handmaidens got over their shock and averted their eyes from the couple, returning to their respective jobs.

“Jesis, darling,” Lucifer purred, running her hand through the wet, curly hair of her uxor. Jesis closed her eyes and leaned into the touch, sighing contentedly. Lucifer was entranced, as she often was upon seeing Jesis, but soon remembered her purpose and her smile faded. She drew her hand back and placed it on one of the marble stones that made up the edge.

“What’s wrong, _pil jarima_? You seem upset.” Jesis had opened her eyes, and was now caressing Lucifer’s jaw, biting her lip in a concerned way. Lucifer sighed, cupping Jesis’s hand with her own.

“While I originally came up to discuss a trade opportunity-“

“Oh! That would be wonderful!”

“-I discovered something... disturbing on my ride here.” Lucifer closed her eyes and took a steadying breath, controlling her reactions as she recalled the traumatic events of the day.

“What? What was it?” Jesis said, sitting up in the water so that her upper torso emerged from the water. The handmaidens were staring down into the water, pausing their cleaning for the moment. Lucifer breathed out through her nose, and opened her eyes.

“They were... some angels were being held as... as _slaves_. By ancestors! Here, in Heaven! They were being whipped horribly, and- and screamed at, and they were _chained_ , and-“ Lucifer’s breath had picked, tears pricking in her eyes. Jesis pulled her into a tight hug, and once the demon had calmed down, they broke apart. Jesis was smiling comfortingly.

“Oh, Lucifer, I should have- should have sent a message! See, you know how you father has been helping us all out?” Lucifer made a noise that was partly a snort and partly a growl, her blood heating up at the mention of her father.

“Yes.” She said, confused as to why Jesis seemed so chipper.

“Well... he said that some of the, uh, lower-class angels would be helping out with building and farming! I’m sure you didn’t fully see the situation, darling, because he promised it would be all okay. They have free homes, too! Near the farms!” Jesis grinned brightly at Lucifer, but the ladder had wide eyes, her mouth agape in shock and disgust. Jesis frowned at her expression.

“Luci? Are you-“ Jesis trailed off as her wife sprung up and marched off, her fists clenched so tightly that blood had sprung up from where her nails had cut into her hands. The door slammed behind her, leaving Jesis and her handmaidens shocked and alone.

Lucifer stormed down the stairs, candles flickering as she went by. Her cloak was fluttering behind her with each heavy step. The servants in the entrance hall all looked at her as her heavy footsteps shook he stairs.

“You-your Majesty?” One servant calls out nervously. Lucifer ignored them, her face scrunched up in anger, her arms shaking.

“Goodbye.” She growled, opening the door herself and slamming it hard with a loud _boom_ , causing the entire room to quake with finality and force.


	11. XI

_“Michael!”_

There was no polite tapping on the door- Lucifer burst through the doors, Angels jumping to get out of her path as she stormed through the halls.

Her sister appeared on her throne- after their mother’s death, she became the Low Queen of the royal family, despite Never officially becoming crowned. The angels talking to her quieted, looking over to see the intrusion.

“Lucifer? Whatever brings you-“ Michael started, her voice even but her eyes betraying the concern she felt. Lucifer was already walking towards a hallway, waving her hand.

“Come. I need to... _discuss_ something with you.”

The poison that laced her sisters words was a warning, and Michael wasted no time following her. After they both arrived in an empty room- a spare bedroom, since there was a bed and bath inside- Lucifer slammed the door and began pacing.

“Sister...”

“It’s ridiculous, Michael! I just went to talk to Jesis and- have you _seen_ those angels? They’re slaves! Enslaved!” Lucifer shouted hands waving in the air as fire danced through her fingers. Her body felt hot, like she was steaming, and she wanted to punch something, someone- _Jesis_ , but not her, because she loved her- and with every step her feet slammed down harshly on the cool floor.

“Luci.”

“I mean honestly!” Lucifer said, turning around for the hundredth time, “She said... not to worry! How _blind_ and _stupid_ could she be! That’s... that’s just... ugh!” Her eyes were burning, and a glimpse of herself in the mirror told her the reason why- they were entirely red, blank, and blazing with anger. She huffed, continuing on.

“Luc-“

“ _Oh, Lucifer, you didn’t fully see the situation!”_ She repeated Jesis’ words mockingly. “Didn’t see- what kind of bullshit is that! I know what I saw- slaves! And she trusts- _hah_! She trusts _our_ father! Him! That bastard that-“

“Lucifer, just _stop_!”

Lucifer paused mid-step, the fires inside her ceasing as she was drawn back to her sister. She looked... strange, gazing at Lucifer with a certain look in her eye that she couldn’t place.

“What?”

Michael laughed, quietly, before confusing Lucifer by letting a tear slip down her cheek, followed by others, racing down the sides of her snow-like face.

“I didn’t... they told me that...” she paused, swallowing hard. “I haven’t seen you... like _this_ before.”

 _Oh_ , thought Lucifer. That makes sense.

Without warning, Michael’s hands were thrown around her sister’s neck, quiet sobs muffled by her heated neck. The pair were stark opposites- the various shades of red being touched, hugged tightly by the varying tints of white. But they were still the same.

“Yeah,” Lucifer smiled weakly, “This is... me. A tad different, I suppose- but I think I’m doing pretty well, considering the wardrobe change.” Michael’s lips twitched into a quick smile as she scanned Lucifer’s body. “How are... you?” Michael met her gaze, eyes watery.

“I’m... doing... fine. I suppose.” She wiped her eyes, chuckling. “I saw... they took some snapshots of you, to send to the news. But they weren’t... close- I suppose you’re finally taller, huh?”

Lucifer laughed, a real laugh, and it felt like a little pressure was carried off her shoulders. She brushed some of her hair out of her eyes, and Michael smiled dimly, sadness seeming to fill her eyes and her heart.

“You look so...” She paused, biting her lip. “So beautiful, Luci. Truly.” Lucifer opened her mouth to make a smartass comment, but Michael raised a hand to silence her. “While this... form... is jarring and new, your my sister. I still love you- and hey! You’re a queen! Mother would be proud, you know.”

Lucifer put a hand on her sisters shoulder, willing her brain to ignore the difference between their skins, a reminder of her imperfections.

“Thank you, Mica.” She sighed. Michael cupped Lucifer’s chin gently, grinning. Suddenly she stopped, her eyes going wide.

“What?” Lucifer asked, concerned, as she carefully removed her sisters hand from her face.

Michael’s mouth was wide. “Jesis- Jesis said that slaves were no big deal?”

She said, incredulous. All of a sudden Lucifer’s previous anger came back with a vengeance. Her fists balled up, nose flaring.

“ _Exactly_. Did you know about them, Michael?”

Michael raised her hands defensively.

“No, of course not! Don’t you think I would have told you?” She sputtered. “I’ve been so overwhelmed with all these responsibilities, making sure everything is being run according to schedule, I have barely been anywhere near these slaves! They’re on the outside of Eden, right?” Lucifer walked over to be small bed, sitting with her head in her hands.

“Correct. In the fields, they’re working on the crops and shit.”

Michael nodded, leaning against the wall and crossing her legs.

“Then I haven’t seen anything. I’ve been in the center of town, taking care of business. But Jesis, did she know before you told her?”

Lucifer threw her hands and head up in the air, falling back on the bed. Her legs and neck hung off the sides, arms splayed out next to her head.

“Yes!” She yelled, fingers curling in the air as if strangling some invisible force. “Yes she did! And she doesn’t- she never told me! Her- _we’re bonded!_ ” Lucifer’s fingers sparked little flames, dancing on her hand. “She doesn’t- does she not trust me? Or did she know I was going to be angry? And if she did-“ Lucifer pushed herself up, hands creating little scorch marks on the fabric of the blanket as she did, “... I just can’t believe this is happening. She couldn’t  really trust our father, could she?”

“We did.” Michael said solemnly, staring at the floor. “Everyone in Eden did. When you were first created, you trusted him. So did I. So did Mother. He’s a tricky bastard, Luci.”

Lucifer sighed, using her hand as a headrest. “But she should know by now he’s not a good person. Right?”

Michael bit her lip, tapping her chin with a finger. “Maybe not. I mean, did you ever tell her?”

“Uh, _duh_.” Lucifer glared at her sister.

Michael rolled her eyes. “No, like, tell her exactly who he was. Did you?”

Lucifer frowned, shaking her head.

Sighing, Michael walked over to her younger sister. She put a hand around Lucifer’s neck, and kissed her cheek.

“I’ll give her some more details, okay? Jesis has always been... peculiar...” Lucifer chuckled, knowing how suspicious Michael had been when Lucifer has started dating her. The elder shook her head, clearing her thoughts. “But I’m sure she’ll see the light soon enough. I, however, _must_ get back to my meeting. I’ll see you again, soon?” Michael pulled her sister off the bed, and Lucifer pulled her into a kiss.

“Of course, I’ll try and come up here again when I have the chance. Walk me out?”

The two exited the room, meeting the impatient eyes of the counselors and handmaidens in the room. Lucifer shot them a glare and the all looked down, intimidated by the tall, muscular demon. She smiled at her success, before suddenly remembering her original reason for coming back to Heaven.

“Oh!” She reached into the pockets of her pants- which was quite handy, she had to admit- and pulled out a red letter, sealed closed and stamped with a small, pink flower. She handed it to Michael. “Give this to Jesis, it’s about trading between Hell and Heaven. I was going to discuss it with her in person, but I doubt I’ll be able to talk with her any further today.”

Michael nodded, her true personality down hidden beneath her stony façade. Around anyone who wasn’t friend or family, she felt she had to be cold, serious, and stern- which, in all fairness, did make people more inclined to listen to her. Lucifer smiled at her sister one last time, before turning and exiting the palace, a handmaiden holding the door open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi I would fucking DIE for Michael Callidus Callistratus. She deserves so much


	12. XII

Michael watched her sister go, one last smile before walking straight through the doors. And with that, she was gone again.

Michael hadn’t cried that hard in thousands of years, not since their mother had died. When Lucifer had fallen, burned so viscously-

_No time for that._

Michael sat on the throne, listening to the counselors, commenting her and there until finally she’d heard enough and, somewhat angrily, dismissed them.

Eventually, she was alone in the huge hall.

She leaned back in the throne, sighing. Her sister had promised to come back, when she could, but seeing that smile, hearing the door close on her Lucifer, her little sister, the angel she’d practically raised-

It reminded her how alone she was.

Ariel still lived in their old house, and always welcomed Michael back whenever she wanted, but the High Countess was so busy she had to sleep in the governmental castle. Gabriel and the twins all lived in that castle still, all together. She missed them so much, her baby sisters, but she barely had time to leave her new home, much less go visit and spend time with her family.

When she had hugged Lucifer, sobbing, she hadn’t noticed how Lucifer smelled at first. But now she recognized it. Her sister smelled of smoke and fire, like charcoal dust. It was heavy and burned her nose a little bit, the thick scent of cinder and ashes as they broke apart, the soft blaze lingering in the air seconds after. Michael had never taken much note to how her sisters smelled- generally Angels didn’t differ much- but now the difference was a harsh reminder, a rude whisper of how estranged they are and would be, forever.

Michael sighed, getting up to prepare for her ride to Jesis’ castle. It was pointless to dwell on such things now.

 _Still_ , she thought, pulling on a white cloak and locking the sides around her neck with a golden clasp, engraved with her family sigil.

_It hurts to miss her._


	13. XIII

Lucifer walked through the city, in a state of muted panic, a hand drifting through her hair as she stared at the soft, white ground.

 _Am I a hypocrite?_ She asked herself, remembering the skittish servants that were currently inside her castle. _They didn’t ask to be there..._

 _But I didn’t either. Neither got a choice- besides, they get paid, they aren’t being **whipped** , I treat them nicely- at least, I hope I do._ She wrapped her arms around herself, trying to steady her uneven breathing. She looked up, seeing the buildings become smaller. It was time to go home.

She swallowed hard, the word “home” feeling bitter and rotted in reference to Hell. She brought the equem back out, taking another shaky breath. Lucifer climbed aboard, and rode quickly back to the tunnel and out of Heaven.

As the surroundings faded from white, to pink, to red, she wondered what things she could do in Hell while waiting for Jesis to come around. The farms were performing well- and they did that _slaveless_ , shockingly!- and the demons seemed to be happy.

_Seem to be. What if they aren’t? What if they secretly have complaints but aren't telling me? What if they hate me?_

The world seemed to fade and blur around her, her thoughts pounding in her ears like drums of war.

_They hate me. Lords, I’m a horrible, fucking stupid ruler._

She gripped the equem tightly, hands trembling.

_This is why I shouldn’t have been God. Dammit!_

Lucifer was dragged out of her paranoia as a demon called out to her. Looking around, she was back in Hell.

 _Wonderful_.

“Your Majesty!” The demon smiled as they approached Lucifer, and the Queen swallowed back her fear and smiled royally.

“Yes, that’s me. Do you need something?” _Good job, you idiot, you sound like an asshole. This is why everyone hates you._

The demon kept smiling.

“I just created something delicious! I’m an aspiring baker, and I was wondering if- assuming you aren’t too busy, you work so hard- you may try it?” They were practically bouncing up and down with excitement. Lucifer was a sucker, and she definitely couldn’t refuse this sweet baker. Plus, she was hungry.

“Of course, I’d love to!” She slid off the equem, put it back in the _noso_ and sent it away. The demon blushed as she walked up to him, towering over him but smiling gently. Lucifer admittedly felt better seeing such pure joy at her appearance- maybe they didn’t hate her. Or at least, this demon didn’t. Score one for Lucifer.

The demon led her past her castle, and past the small marketplace near it. There were a few houses there too, most empty though. Lucifer planned on putting those closest to her in those, whenever the Legion of Hell, the group of demons in charge of Hell, actually formed. There was farmland by the Phlegethon river, and a few demons were relaxing in it, in various states of undress. They smiled and waved at the pair as they walked by. They came around the curve, and passed the empty Fields of Punishment off to the side- with no creations in the mortal world, there wasn’t anyone in need of eternal punishment. Lucifer was both worried and curious about when those would become necessary.

They came into the populated area- houses were built both on the ground and into the rocky walls. Here, the demons were much more plenty, and the respectfully bowed as Lucifer passed them. The Queen still wasn’t used to them- or her. She was used to being royalty, but not a ruler- and not a _demon_ ruler, especially.

Finally, they arrived at a small bakery. “Aamon’s Food” was written in Enochian runes. The demon, now known to Lucifer as Aamon, pushed the door open, holding it for Lucifer to enter.

The building was quite small, only a few tables and a counter, but Aamon seemed to glow as they stepped in. They looked up, grinning.

“Do you like it? I know it’s not much, but-“

“I love it, Aamon.” Lucifer examined the room, feeling how much love had gone into it. This seemed to please Aamon, as they basically danced over to the counter to grab a plate and some sort of food.

“Please, sit, Your Highness!” He called from behind the assortment of food. Lucifer obliged. Soon, Aamon bounces over, a plate with a small, brown square in one hand and a drink in the other. They set them both down, and then sit across from Lucifer.

Lucifer picks up the square curiously. It was quite crumbly, but felt soft in her hand. In the center, there was a swirl what appeared to be some sort of cream. Aamon was patiently waiting, a bright smile on their face, but Lucifer could see the nervousness in their eyes. She popped the square into her mouth, and was met with a pleasant burst of spice. Multiple hot flavors broke apart, but the cream tasted much sweeter. Lucifer hummed with enjoyment, and swallowed.

She picked up the glass of red-tinged water. “That was delicious, Aamon! What was it?” Lucifer asked, taking a sip of the water- small bits of sediment came with it, from the river, but Lucifer wasn’t concerned. A demon’s body was so hot, any food or drink that entered would be burned to nothingness after it’s nutrition was absorbed.

“Well, I call it Mizuxe! It’s based off an old recipe from the past demons- but I added the cream.” Their hands flapped as they spoke, excitement radiating from their eyes. They reminded Lucifer of Azrael, somewhat- they both had similar body shapes, though Aamon was significantly shorter. They both got very excited when talking about activities they enjoyed- Aamon liked baking, Azrael liked painting and debating. That’s probably why they both got along so well.

Aamon was almost as cute as Azrael- _forget I said that_ , she quickly thought- and Lucifer probably would have invited to them home her home had she not been so upset at the day’s revelations. Perhaps another time, she would see Aamon at her home- hopefully with less clothes. Lucifer laughed at herself for that thought, it was so similar to how she would think… _before_ all this. She hadn't changed much in that aspect.

“Your Majesty? Are you alright?” Aamon was holding the now-empty plate. “You zoned out for a bit there, and you seemed to be concerned.”

Lucifer waved them off.

“It’s nothing you did, Aamon. I just... found out something that disturbed me today. But hopefully it should be over with soon.”

Aamon walked over to the counter, setting the plate down, then began making their way back.

“What was it, My Lord?” Aamon pulled their chair closer to Lucifer, sitting down. Lucifer sighed, crossing her legs and laying her head back.

“I discovered that in Heaven, some of the poorer angels are being used as- used as slaves, in the farms.” She took a long drink of the water, wishing it was alcohol. Aamon gasped, horrified.

“Really? Did you tell your father?”

Lucifer scoffed. “He’s the one who put them in chains. He doesn’t care.”

Aamon didn’t seem to be comforted by this. Their eyes only grew wider.

“Really? You seem to be taking that quite calmly.”

“Let’s just say I’m not very surprised he’s done something like this. Our family wasn’t the model of happiness like we wanted everyone to believe.”

Saying that fact out loud, Lucifer reflexively flinched. Centuries of hiding abuse, terror, and scars- and now she was just... telling a commoner. That her father was horrible. Just like she’d always dreamed.

_What if one of the ancestors is outside? And listening? He’ll hear about this. He’s gonna heard you blabbing about him, like the loud mouthed idiot you are, and come down here and take out his knife and-_

“Oh, I’m so sorry. I wish I’d known before, Your Highness. You didn’t deserve any bad things he did, I’m sure.”

Lucifer downed the rest of her drink quickly, and set the cup down. She wished it wasn't water. “Thank you, Aamon. Believe me, I would have loved for the people to have known...” She paused, biting her lip. She lowered her voice to a whisper, leaning in. “He was horrible to me.”

Aamon smiled sadly, and put one hand over Lucifer’s, which had laced together at some point.

“If you ever need to talk about it, I won’t tell anyone if you don’t want me to.”

Lucifer wanted to tell them so much more- the words were right there, words like _knife_ and _blood_ and _training_ , but she didn’t.

Maybe one day, she would finally feel safe enough. Safe enough to tell people every sick, twisted thing he forced her to go through.

“Thank you, Aamon. I will. Have a wonderful day!”

But not today.

She stepped back into the palace, giving her cloak to a servant and asking him to send some new pots and bowls to Aamon, at the edge of Cain City. The servant obliged, bowing before scurrying off to collect the gifts. The Queen sighed, and told the rest of the servants that she was going to her room to work and wasn’t to be disturbed until day.

That night, Lucifer got drunk and cried in her room until she fell asleep.


	14. XIV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First TW: A nightmare references physical abuse of a child  
> Second TW: Description of recent self harm scars and getting drunk to deal with emotions.

* * *

 

_“How fucking **stupid** could you be!”_

_Lucifer’s father is towering above her, and she is just a child. She’s only had a handful of girlfriends. Her hands are in front of her, fear racing through her body._

_“I-I’m sorry, I tried- I tried to-to tell h-her that it-“ Her explanation was cut short when his fist collided with her face. Blood trickled out of her nose, and she breathed heavily through her mouth. A foot came down on her side, and she cried out as her back twisted painfully. Another foot, on her neck, and this time there was a golden dagger impaled in her shoulder. Lucifer screamed._

_“P-please, Fa-fath-ther!” A sharp kick to her jaw sends her reeling, and she feels blood in her mouth and throat._

_“You are trying to ruin this family. Trying to ruin **me**. You little **bitch** , did you think I wouldn’t find out? You liar.” There’s another kick, to the side of her face, then another, and he just keeps going and **going** , Kick, kick, kick- _

_He grabs her by the hair, lifts her up, and  Lucifer has been sobbing for a while now. Her face marred with blood._

_“I’m gonna show you what happens to little **fools** who go crying like a child to some whore she met on the street. You’re lucky we haven’t tossed you out, you little whore, for all this trouble. That’s all you are, trouble. And good-for-nothing troublesome children? They get this.” _

_He swings her, a vice grip on her hair, and slams her face into the wall. Her chin hits the floor but he’s back at it again._

_“YOU-“_

_SLAM! Blood is in her eye._

_“ARE-“_

_SLAM! Blood is filling up her mouth._

_“LUCKY-“_

_SLAM! She sees gold out of the corner of her eye._

_“I-“_

_SLAM! She feels the skin break on her forehead. The skin tears open on her cheek. She feels blood gushing out, violent._

_“DONT-“_

_SLAM! There’s blood, red and red and then gold and gold._

_“KILL-“_

_SLAM! Her head is fuzzy. She can barely breathe. There’s black, coming in closer._

_“YOU!”_

_Lucifer tries to blink her eyes and her head slams down one more time, hard, and everything goes black._

* * *

 

Lucifer screams, broken and raw and terrified, when she wakes up.

She’s panting, sobbing, and she pulls her knees up to her chest. Shutting her eyes, she takes shaky breaths as she runs her hands through her hair. The horrors of the dream are slowly fading, but Lucifer remembers every detail. She lived through it once- and now she’s cursed to live through it over and over again.

And now, Michael isn’t there to comfort her at night.

Looking up, Lucifer swallows thickly as she examined her room. Her clothing was stained with alcohol- several bottles were scattered around the room, mostly smashed. A chair, that had been at her desk, was broken on the floor, legs snapped and back bent.

* * *

 

Her pants were somewhere on the floor as well- she could see her legs were exposed, and it was obvious why. Old blood had dried in streaks along her legs, from the fresh new wounds she must have made last night. Luckily for her, none were deep enough to need help. However, her older scars were exposed- they ran criss-crossed across her legs and arms, some caused by her, others by her father. The two vertical ones on her wrists taunted her, slightly raised as if they were daring her to break them again. She slammed her hands down on the bed, and her glamour was raised once more, hiding any signs of scars, past or present. A broken bottle, stained with blood, is sitting on the dresser at the foot of her bed. Lucifer sighs, wipes her tears and gets up.

* * *

 

At the same time, a servant opens the door, eyes wide.

“My Lord! I heard you scream-“ The servant stops, mouth agape as she takes in the messy room.

Lucifer was exhausted, both from her binge drinking and from the nightmare. Her emotions felt like they had been scraped out with a dull pitchfork.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Bad dream. Don’t worry about it.” She waved her hand away. “Just leave, you’re dismissed.”

The servant was still in shock, but nodded and quietly closed the door. Once she left, Lucifer sat down and put her hands over her eyes.

“I cannot wait until this entire slavery deal is fucking over with.” She mumbled to herself. “All this discussion of my childhood... once this is all over, I can just go back to repressing my memories and never talking about them again.”

She removed her hands and drew up her magic, lifting the broken glass up from around the room. Flames flickered between her fingers as she organized the glass into a group, before setting it in the trash. She looked to the broken chair.

There was no saving it- honestly, it could have sustained much worse damage. When Lucifer was both drunk and upset, her strength tended to be dangerously free. But the horrid state that her chair was still bad enough that it needed to be replaced. Lucifer sighed, collapsing back on her bed, hands flung over her eyes.

“I really need to cut back on the drinking,” she mumbled to herself. “Or get stronger chairs.”

After a entirely-too-long time spent cleaning up after herself, Lucifer dressed, donning a pair of white pants, a low cut shirt, and a regal jacket, in an attempt to make up for her drunken rampage the past night. Her servants fluttered around, their friendly yet nervous energy calming her slightly. She walked up to the one who most often took care of the mail, a perky demon named Meriel, who had been cleaning along the hallways of the castle.

“Meriel!” She called, putting on a grin that was much too large in comparison to how she felt. Meriel jumped, pulling herself out of her daydream, before returning Lucifer’s smile and bowing deeply.

“Your Highness, it’s a pleasure to see you!” She rose up, meeting Lucifer’s eyes, which was not a common trait in demons thus far. Lucifer appreciated it.

“Meriel, have you received a letter from either my sister or the Empress? I am expecting one, and I was hoping it might have arrived.”

Meriel bit her lip, thinking, before shaking her head.

“No, I do not believe there was one. But the moment it arrives, I’ll make sure you receive it immediately!" Lucifer nodded, her smile fading.

“Yes, yes. Thank you very much, Meriel. I shall see you later.”

Meriel nodded, and returned to her cleaning as Lucifer turned and walked away. Anxiety was crashing through her, and she clenched her hands as she traveled through the halls to the kitchen. The thoughts of those angels, kept in chains, being whipped- her own memories of the whip were harsh enough. She knew how truly horrible that punishment was. She despised her father for turning his cruelty from just his child, to his own people- he’d always had a peculiar opinion on the commoners. It was the job of royalty to care for the divine beings of the world, and yet- he always seemed annoyed by their presence. It wasn’t surprising he did this- but is was horrible. What did surprise her was that Jesis-

“My Lord, would you like something to eat?” A servant’s voice rang through, drawing Lucifer out of her head. She smiled politely.

“Just some, eh, taifiea- you know that, yes?”

The servant blushed slightly.

“It sounds familiar, but…”

Lucifer laughed.

“It’s made from those plants that grow along rivers, the veria, and you beat them and add a sweet-savory creme, and you mix them. Got it?” Lucifer had fond memories of the meal- Michael often made it after special occasions, and it had been the first dish Ariel had learned to cook, when their mother and Lucifer taught her. One of her rare happy memories as a young child.

The servant seemed to remember the dish now, and scurried off to prepare it. Lucifer walked into the dining area, the large, glittering, round table already set up. The other tables were scattered around the circular room, all set up, yet not a soul was actually sitting at any of them- in fact, no one but Lucifer was there. The room felt empty, but Lucifer already knew deeply how that felt, so she simply sat down at the main table, and accepted that this was her life now- no more large family of siblings to eat with. No friends to join her.

The ceiling stretched far up, and she wondered if there was a way she could project her stars unto the ceiling- at least that would curb her depression, to be able to see her most prized creation.

The servant brought her the taifiea. It wasn’t nearly as good as Michael’s or Ariel’s, but it was good nonetheless. She had barely began her breakfast before Meriel burst through the doors, a white paper in one hand, smiling broadly at her leader.

“A letter from your sister, Queen Michael, My Lord!” Meriel bounced up to the table, bowed, and left the letter, before running off from whence she came. Lucifer enjoyed the eager demon’s presence- she didn’t seem to fear Lucifer as the others did. She hoped other demons would follow suit- she didn’t like being feared.

She opened the letter- a small, white flower was stamped on a seal, in true Michael fashion- and began reading fervently.

_Dearest Sister, and Queen of Hell, Lucifer Callidus Callistratus,_

_I hope you are doing well since our talk- I went to the Empress as soon as I was able to. I regret to inform you that I did not seem to make a dent in her strong belief in the plans._

_Despite going more in depth into what we had discussed, she simply insisted that I should trust her and the plans. I must tell you, I did foresee this betrayal of sorts- you will remember the first moment you asked for my blessing on your bonding._

_I admit, I am at a loss- She refuses to listen to reason, and neither you or I seem to have affected her thus far. I resign myself from this task- we have never had a close relationship, and you know how I have always felt towards her- But I pray you have better luck. Perhaps another discussion with her would do her some good? She has always seemed fond of you, as you her, and I imagine if she would listen to one of us, you’d have the greatest effect._

_I do hope this resolves itself shortly- for everyone involved._

_I wish you the best of luck, and if you require assistance of any kind, do not ever hesitate to approach me._

_Your Loving Older Sister,_

_Low Queen and High Countess Michael Callidus Callistratus_

Lucifer squeezed the paper in her hands, anger heating up inside her, before she realized the edges of the letter was being singed by flames- the paper was not fireproof, unlike everything else in Hell- and she quickly set it down. She, instead of burning paper, stook up abruptly, knocked over a chair, and abandoned her meal in favor of heading down to her training room.

She summoned three clones- nameless faces, just divine-like enough to be pretend adversaires- and proceeded to brutally wreck them. She knocked the first one back a few paces with a punch, before dropping down as the second tried to punch her while sweep-kicking the third’s legs out. She grabbed the second’s arm, swinging hima around before throwing him into a wall. She tossed the third into the first, before pushing her hands outwards and sending a inferno out from her soul, to her palms and into the room- keeping the blaze going for a solid twenty seconds before extinguishing it, leaving every clone defeated.

She breathed heavily, mostly due to anger and less from exertion. The letter had her in utter disbelief- and now that the initial rage was over, she felt…

Unbearably sad.

Jesis had bonded with her. She _loved_ her. She loved Lucifer, and yet, she kept denying this. Lucifer had long considered confessing everything to Jesis- every scar, every brutal flashback, everything she kept under lock and key and glamour- because Lucifer had actually begun to _trust_ , after millenia of paranoia and overwhelming fear and dread, she began to _love_ and _bond_ and _trust_ , and now the woman she would die without had just basically called her a liar, overdramatic, after everything she’d been through, _Jesis_ didn’t even care, didn’t love her enough to believe-

Lucifer’s legs buckled, hot tears marring her faces and causing her to choke on her quick breathes. She fell to her knees on the floor, cries coming out of nowhere, and Lucifer stared emptily at the floor. Her limp body twitched with each broken sob, and she gasped for air as her breathe seemed to come faster and faster until she couldn’t seem to breathe any longer.

She put her head in her hands and sobbed for Lords knows how long. Tears dried in tracks along her cheeks, only to be run over by fresh streams. No one came down.

Just her, alone and heartbroken, deep in the pits of Hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First TW: Lucifer had a nightmare about her father hitting her head against a wall until she passed out. He's mad because one of the angels she had sex with almost found out about the abuse.
> 
> Second TW: Lucifer realizes that she self-harmed by cutting the other night, but it isnt serious. She is reminded of her other scars before reapplying her glamour to make the scars disappear.


	15. XV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: This entire chapter is around slavery and the phsyical/verbal abuse of a child, so if that will trigger you, just read the summary!

The next morning, Lucifer left for Eden.

She wasn’t particularly excited to leave her kingdom again so soon, especially for this mission, but she couldn’t sit by as innocents were kept in chains.

She wouldn’t have a will to live left if she did something like that.

So, she boarded an equem once more and rode up the tunnel, up into the cold, white light of Heaven. He tried to deny the existence of the anxiety building in her stomach, to little avail. As she neared the city, she couldn’t yet hear or see the slaves; they were there, though, waiting just across the bustling capital of Heaven.

How her wondrous hometown became such a center for evil both baffled her and left her unsurprised. After all, her father did live here.

She rode through the streets, barely acknowledging the various greetings from the angels below. Her head was drifting madly, fading in and out of existence. The only thing that kept her mind in her body was her mission.

Finally, she heard a whip crack, and her body instantly shot up, back straight and muscles taut. She slid off the equem, putting it in a noso and continuing towards those traumatic noises on foot. The sounds of groans and pained angels caused her breathe to race faster and faster, but she kept going forward. She needed to see them again, despite every part of her being screaming against it.

Finally, she walked up to the edge of the fields. Her body was shaking wildly, her eyes unfocused, but even then she stood and took it in.

Angels raked and planted and picked in the fields, shirtless and bloodied. Some laid on the ground, ichor on their backs, and Lucifer wanted deeply to convince herself they were unconscious. She ignored how their bodies were dormant, never rising. The others seemed to follow suit, trying their best to maneuver around them, but one could see their eyes flicker back and forth from the ground to the bodies, hand shaking around their tools. Lucifer felt sick, and sicker as she saw children- lash wounds seeming larger and more terrible on their smaller backs, that were supposed to be snow-white and soft, instead raised from deep slashes and a horrific red color across their entire body.

One child fell- they were too, too young to be doing such hard labor, and their eyes fluttered, and exhausted, they fell. An older angel looked to them, and soon abandoned her work to rush over and cradle the small head in her lap.

“Tariel? Darling, are you okay? Tariel, please, are you okay?” She begged, trying to turn the child over. Tears pricked in her eyes, voice growing louder. “Tariel, please, wake up. Please! Please, baby, be okay, _please_!”

Lucifer could see the light, but existent, breathing. Tariel was still alive, but in her panic, the mother- Lucifer assumed they were the mother, based off how she reacted and cradled the younger angel- was terrified that the child had died. Lucifer understood why.

They probably wouldn’t have been the first child to drop dead while working.

Lucifer snapped out of her trace, and began taking a step forward. She could probably help heal Tariel- or, at least, move them somewhere safe and comfort their mother. But just as she began to move, an Ancestor took notice of the scene. Alarm thrummed through her, her mind stopping herself before she could get too close. The angry, golden glare he was sending to the child was too familiar. She watched intently as he walked over, whip in clenched hand.

“What are you two doing? There’s no resting on the job!” His voice dripped with poisonous hate, yet there was a cruel smile on his face. The mother looked up, tears dripping down her cheeks, and her eyes widened in a way Lucifer knew, personally, meant trauma and terror.

“S-sir, my child, they fell- please, they need help, they need a healer. Please-” the mother never got to finish her sentence. A harsh slap caused her to fall back, crying out in pain. The Ancestor kicked the child’s body over, and Tariel groaned quietly. He bent over, picking the child’s limp body up by their neck.

“You. Wake up.” When Tariel did not respond, he shook them violently. “Wake up, You lazy mutt!”

Finally Tariel’s eyes opened lazily. Once they saw the face of the Ancestor, they instinctively began to struggle to escape the harsh grip. It was to no avail, and the same instincts kept Lucifer rooted to her spot, petrified.

“Sleeping on the job, eh? We’ll fix that behaviour. Children need to learn respect-” he tightened his grip on Tariel’s neck, and lifted the whip in the other. “And punishment.”

Tariel’s hands snapped up to their neck, trying to claw the fist away. Lucifer’s breath caught in her throat, her own hand itching to touch her own neck, to confirm her father’s hand wasn’t there. It did soon leave- but only when he threw Tariel down to the ground, before grabbing their arm and forcing them over onto their stomach. Tariel’s back was laced with small scars, but nothing as major as Lucifer had seen on others- they must have only recently started working. Perhaps they had just come of age.

“You-” He pointed at Tariel’s mother, who now stood, staring with tears in her eyes at the scene before her. “If you try to help, in any way, I’ll only be harsher. Now _stay_.”

The whip was lifted, paired with a large grin on the Ancestor’s face.

The whip flashed through the air, cracking sharply.

The whip landed on the small back. Tariel screamed.

Blood pooled into the gash, radiant against fresh white skin.

The whip was lifted.

Lucifer watched every single lash, and every cry of that innocent life being taken etching itself into her memory. She did not let herself look away, she did not let tears blur her vision sweetly. She stared into that horror, she took it in. She made sure that she wouldn’t forget this moment, she would remember it every second of her life until it she knew this wouldn’t ever happen again.

Finally, the whip drew up and cracked down for the final time. Tariel’s blood stained the ground, stained their clothes, and stained their back. They were somewhere between being awake and passing out, eyes wide but unfocused, body taut but unmoving. Lucifer knew how they felt. It only fueled her anger.

“Do not touch them. Do not help them. They will stay here all night. If you try to help in anyway- it’ll be much worse, next time.” With that warning, the Ancestor turned to leave, only to lock eyes with Lucifer.

He did not look at her with reverence, or fear, or surprise, like every other divine being to see her. He simply stared at her with cold animosity.

“Queen.” He stated in an emotionless voice. He turned away, and went back to his station overviewing the slaves.

Once she knew for certain that his attention was elsewhere, she approached the mother, and Tariel’s limp body. She tried to bend down in a bow, but her shaking legs caused her to almost fall.

“Your Highness-”

“Don’t.” She looked up, confused, but stood up straight regardless.

“What’s your name?” Her eyes were firmly on the ground.

“Iena, Queen Lucifer.”

“I’m sorry, Iena.”

Lucifer took off her jacket, and laid it across Tariel. She lulled him into sleep using a calming spell, and brushed his bloodied hair out of his face. The jacket was sewn using fine threads, the gold weaving signifying it was made for royals. It was valuable, and would be difficult to clean if it was dirtied. Blood was already soaking through it. Lucifer did not care.

Iana looked on in shock, both at the jacket and at the fact Lucifer- a member of the Royal family, Queen of Hell- was currently on the ground in front of her. A Callidus Callistratus did not simply lower themselves so deeply to a commoner. That was saved for people deeply revered.

Lucifer did not care.

“Keep the jacket, will you? They’ll know it wasn’t your doing. And-” Lucifer stood up, putting a hand on Iana’s shoulder. She fought the tears in her eyes, and lost immediately.

“I am so, so sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Lucifer goes back to the fields, and sees how bad everything is. She witnesses a child being punished for passing out and has a sort of dissociation reaction to it. She gives the child her cloak and apologizes.


	16. XVI

It was a true miracle that Lucifer wasn’t hammered already.

After that ultimate disaster, she’d love nothing more, but even _she_ knew that being drunk wouldn’t help her in talking-slash-yelling  some sense into Jesis.

She hated yelling at her, of course, but at a certain point this all became unbearable, for a host of reasons that Lucifer did not want to get into. She tried not to think about Jesis’s disbelief in what Michael had said about their father, focusing instead on the angels being tortured not too far behind her.

The castle doors loomed in front of her, their platinum white never having seemed so dark. Everything in her was pushing her away, wanting her to turn and run back, to Hell or Michael, or anywhere else but the castle than held such tense energy.

She breathed in quickly, and pushed open the doors.

None of the angels seemed overly happy to see her. It made sense, after what had happened last time she had been there. Servants shrunk away from her, refusing to meet her eyes and instead trying to steal glances when they thought she wasn’t looking. Lucifer didn’t really care at that moment, though- she had more important business.

Jesis was sitting upon her throne, seeming nervous at the sudden appearance of her uxor. The advisers around her had gone quiet. The entire room was filled with the silence, charged with tension and fear. Lucifer’s heavy footsteps created some noise, but the tension only seemed to grow.

“Lucifer.” Jesis said politely, voice breaking in the middle. “It is… eh, welcome back.”

Lucifer grinned, not in a friendly way, nor a kind or romantic way. Her sharp teeth were bared, the long canines that were particular to demons exposed overtly, lips raised to reveal them fully. Her eyes were sharp knives, stabbing into Jesis relentlessly. She shifted in her seat, breaking eye contact to look somewhere to the side. Lucifer began walking up the steps that lead to the throne, hands folded neatly behind her back.

“I heard my dear sister talked to you recently. On a quite interesting subject matter, I hear? Such a shame we have such-“ her foot came down with a slam as she reached the top, leaning into Jesis. “- _different_ opinions on the subject, eh?”

Jesis swallowed, leaning back slightly.

“Lucifer, dear, are you feeling quite alright?”

Lucifer relented, leaning back and dropping the smile slightly. “As a matter of fact, _dearest_ , I haven’t been feeling so well today. Or in general, actually. I do _wonder_ why that could _be_.”

Jesis looked down, either embarrassed or intimidated. Or, preferably, both.

“Lucifer, if you wish to discuss this, may we please go somewhere else?”

“No.”

She snapped her fingers, and ordered every servant _out_. Lucifer’s voice snapped with restrained anger and everyone quickly obliged- if one or two or more of them spared a thought for the fact that Lucifer was not their boss, they did not make it known.

“I want to discuss it _here_ , with you sitting here all high-and-mighty on your throne. You know what I saw today, Jesis?”

Jesis did not respond, keeping her eyes firmly locked on the ground, so Lucifer continued.

“I saw a _child_ being whipped half to death. Why? Because they passed out in a field from exhaustion. Now tell me, _Jesis_ , how exactly did I _misinterpret_ this scene now? Eh?”

Jesis still remained silent, and Lucifer tightened her jaw and fists, breathing heavily.

“My father beat me, you know.”

Jesis looked up, eyes wide. Perhaps she ignored the tears in her lover’s eyes.

“Horrifically, might I add. Whatever horrid thing you can imagine, I probably went through it. So believe me when I say that _he is doing this. This is happening._ And I can’t stand by, turn a blind eye to _this_ kind of injustice! This isn’t mere rulebreaking- this is _sinful_.”

Jesis sighed, turning back away from Lucifer, who was staring her down.

“Lucifer, I can’t- Obviously I can't confirm or deny _anything_. I’ve been far too busy here to even go _outside_ , much less all the way to the fields. And if he _did_ to the things you say- if he is doing them- then.., then it shouldn’t take much to get some proper evidence, should it?”

Lucifer stood stiffly, arms shaking. Her breath came in short puffs, eyes staring holes into her uxor.

“What?”

“I-I said-“

“You.” Lucifer stepped forward, diminishing the space between the two. “You know _nothing_ about me, about us, about my _family_ , and you care even _less_!”

Jesis raised her hands, opening her mouth to speak her own defense, but Lucifer cut her off.

“How could you _ever_ understand what we-I, Michael, our sisters- went through? How could you understand this- this emptiness? You _don’t_ , you don’t care at all. People are _dying, Jesis!”_

“Lucifer-“

“Do you know who’s hands their blood is on? For my father it’s just another layer of red and gold. But are you willing to accept that those perfect little white hands of yours are being soaked by the very angels you are supposed to _protect_?” Lucifer was shouting now, the candles around the room going from being completely burnt out to blowing up in huge plumes of fire and smoke.

“Lucifer, you have to understand my position-“

“FUCK your position, Jesis! If you refuse to admit your complacency in government-mandated _murder_ , I’ll force it into the light!”

“ _Lucifer_.” Jesis rose from her seat on the throne, and Lucifer had to take a step down to allow space for her to stand. The God had gone from quiet and nervous to cold. She was staring, eyebrows furrowed and hands fisted, deeply at Lucifer. The two did not break eye contact, nor speak, for what felt like hours.

“I understand you are angry, but to call me a _murderer_? That is just… low. Now, I must ask you to- no, I _demand_ you leave so I may continue my work. I will not stand here and be insulted. I wouldn't be surprised if you were-” Jesis abruptly cut herself off, but Lucifer tilted her head in enraged curiosity.

“If I was what?”  
“Drunk. High. Both, I don’t know. Just… leave, come back when we can talk in a _civilised_ manner.”

Lucifer bit back a scathing remark, and instead turned, stomping down the stairs. The candles on the walls burned high, flames licking the walls and ceilings. Servants nervously peered into the room, watching both deities moves.

“You _would_ know a lot about being uncivilised, wouldn't you.” Lucifer called out into the tense air. Before Jesis could respond, the door slammed and Lucifer was gone from the palace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one of my favorite chapters ngl. It just... *kisses* it hits different


	17. XVII

"Lucifer, at this rate, you are gonna die from stress. You're so tense."

The devil laid back back in her chair, legs up on the table and bottle in hand. Michael shook her head at her sister, but made no move to stop her.

"You'd be too, if you were in my situation." Lucifer took a long drink, hand flexing around the bottle. "What can I even do now?" Lucifer asked, biting her lip.

"No support from Jesis, _Father's_ back, and I have a whole country to keep from collapsing!" She threw back another swig of bitter alcohol, wiping the excess from her mouth roughly.

"And Jesis! Honestly, Jesis is just so... insufferable! There is peoples lives at stake, and she just... spits in my face and goes back to her good-girl act."

Michael only nodded, hand resting on her sister's tight shoulder.

“Now sister, we must take into consideration that Jesis simply… will not come around.¨

“Michael!” Lucifer leaped up, turning around to face her sister. “Don’t speak like that! We’ll convince her, I’ll convince her, somehow-”

Michael shook her head. “Lucifer, seriously. I know you adore her, but she believes our Father. We have to prepare for the worst possible solution."

Lucifer huffed, falling back down onto her chair.

"What, our deaths?"

"No," Michael said, laughing. "That simple talk cannot solve this problem. That we need to find... _another_ solution."

Lucifer stopped her sulking, suddenly become intrigued.

"Whatever do you mean by that?"

Michael waved her hand, feigning nonchalance.

"Oh, nothing, just that, well... If we cannot convince _Jesis_ , we can always convince our people. Theres more of us than Father, of course."

"Um, Father as an entire generation on his side as well-"

"False!" Michael yelled, hands clapped together. Lucifer recognized the scheming look in her eyes very well.

"Not every divine being from the last Cycle works for Father, we know this. However, we have many, many capable sol- er, we have many capable hands to help protest against him." She smiled sickeningly wide. "And we cannot forget how _smart_ and, well, _strong_ you are!"

Tires of evasion, Lucifer rose up from her chair to face her sister, eye to eye.

"What exactly do you mean by that?"

Michael wasnt fazed.

"Lucifer, you have all of Hell in the palm of your hand. Surely you realize by now how much power you hold? Combine that with your ever intelligent and tactile mind, and well..." She shrugged, turning and walking away.

"You could do quite a lot with that, that's all I'm saying. Honestly."

Lucifer said nothing, letting the words soak in the air.

"Now, not that I dont _love_ and enjoy your presence," Michael continued, perfectly fine with continuing the one-way conversation. "But I have quite a lot to do here, and I imagine you do as well, so I'm sorry to say I must bid you farewell for now!"

Lucifer left the palace, kissing her sister on the cheek and promising to take care of herself, and to "please think about what we've said, alrighty?"

She walked back to Hell on foot. A cold wind blew through her hair, and her skin sizzled in response. Michael's words bounced around in her head- tactical mind, she had said. How much power she held, she had mentioned. How strong she was, a protest, another solution- Michael was being explicitly heavy on the subtext in that conversation, like she had her own little plot going on she wanted Lucifer to personally figure out for her.

It was an exhausting game they played.

Did she want Lucifer to fight for her? For them? It's not like she wouldn't- Lucifer was known through the Eden youth for two vices, sex and violence. But it was... intimidating.

No, intimidating was so wrong. It was a terrifying feat to consider.

 _Her. Lucifer Callidus Callistratus._ Fighting her father. The man who had basically tortured her into becoming his overglorified attack animal. That's basically suicide!

Then again, suicide has never stopped Lucifer before. Pretty much the exact opposite, mostly thanks to said father.

This mental argument was already causing a migraine. Lucifer had never felt better to see the faint warmth and red light from the cave entrance in the distance. She began to jog, before slowly growing it into a run, and then she was sprinting, speeding through the smooth, cold air and soft, frosted ground like s little child. She laughed a bit at that.

Her feet landed on hard, ground, and she slowed down as she reentered the Underworld.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Michael and her scheming ass


	18. XVIII

Instead of heading left straight home after entering Hell, Lucifer turned right, walking past the mostly empty land right near the castle.

In the farthest corner, one could make out the odd feeling of emptiness and darkness, emanating from the opaque depths of a cave.

The ground inside felt sticky, like dark mud. As she entered the cave, light quickly began to be sucked out, the heavy dark night swallowing it like a great black serpent, and leaving Lucifer, creature of light, wandering, shaken, in it's stomach.

Lucifer suddenly felt a sharp, steep drop- catching herself just before she fell straight off into the depths.

Taking a few quick, steadying breaths, she unfolded her wings from the hidden dimension where they were kept, and let herself fall.

The wings acted as a parachute, and Lucifer landed gracefully, the thin, skin-like wings folding back against her shoulders and disappearing once more. Lucifer looked up, eyes meeting great buildings with cold, white light emanating from the windows.

She had entered Xasa, the world of the Reapers.

They muddled around the streets as she entered, their whole world a patchwork of deep, seeping black and harsh white, like Heaven had dripped down through some hole in the sky and slung holy light across the people and their buildings with some paintbrush. They stared at her, mouths moving in quick, shocked Enochian to tell their friends and colleagues.

"Did you see her? Shes here!"

"Why do you think shes arrived?"

"Is it Azrael? Are they meeting?"

"Are they... y'know, meeting meeting?"

"I heard she was having some sort of yelling fit with Jesis, I hope she isnt here to pull the same kind of thing with our Leader."

She ignored them; a skill accumulated from those thousands of years in Heaven as Princess, when angels similarly tutted around, gawking at her and her beauty, prattling off with slippery Enochian tongues about her latest escapade or the dress she wore- or the lack of one, when she didnt feel like wearing one and opted instead for tight riding pants- or whatever they seemed to focus on that day. She had grown accustomed to her prescense never escaping the people around her, never being able to escape the fact she had been a household name since birth. She pushed their words out of sight, and out of mind, so she could focus in on her destination.

In the center of the great, shadowed city, an imposing building stood high above everything else, spire reaching so high Lucifer could imagine it in her mind scraping the ceiling of the cave. It was impressive and it's existence seemed to ring throughout the city, as the Reapers near it seemed simply in awe just by being close to the great, stone doors.

Lucifer did not let herself be so openly swayed by the appearance.

It only took two knocks before the door was opened, a stone faced Reaper looking at her with an immediate look of exasperation.

"Look, Her Majesty will not be taking any more visitors, now please-"

The Reaper met her eyes, the slow burning maroon meeting shocked black, so wide that they seemed to be swimming in the white sclera.

"I do hope she'll make time for me, as I am no visitor." Lucifer told her, voice flat and slightly gravely. The Reaper smiled chickishly, sliding out of her way as she spoke rapidly about how Azrael was in her study, working, and how they could go ahead of Lucifer if she wanted, but Lucifer waved her off with a "no, thank you, I'm fine," and simply followed their directions to Azrael's study.

Lucifer had the decency to knock, at least, before opening the door and letting herself in. Azrael was sat in the dark room, black furniture spread out everywhere- it was all quite neat and untouched, despite how long Azrael had been living there. However, the reaper always had been a fan of minimalism.

"Lucifer," Azrael said in a controlled tone, setting down her quill. "I didn't realize you were visiting."

"I'm not."

"Oh?" Azrael watches Lucifer pull up a chair, and swing herself around dramatically to sit on it, legs spread.

"I'm here to talk. About Jesis- about Heaven."

Azrael did not let any emotion slip- if she had heard the talk on the streets about her and Jesis's fights, Lucifer couldn't tell yet.

"Oh? Go right ahead."

"Well.." Lucifer drew in a sharp breath. Her hands fisted her pants, red skin growing pale. If one looked closely, they could see the white of her fangs showing through her grimace.

"My Father is in control of the universe and keeping angels as slaves, and I cannot do anything about it because Jesis doesn't believe me, and I know its him because hes a _bastard_ and a _horrific excuse_ for an angel, and I know this because-" She cut herself off, biting her lip as Azrael let her surpise show through her neutral facade.

"Oh."

"Yes. Oh."

"So... Jesis... she-"

"She is being a _bitch_ , no matter what I try. Michael can't get to her, either. I dont know what to _do_ , o-or where to _turn_ -" Lucifer hated herself for the desperation seeping into her voice. She needed to stay strong- even if this was her friend, even if she didnt really need to keep up appearances around Azrael, her father's voice was echoing in her mind, controlling her movements once more.

Dont show weakness. Dont show emotion. Never let them see you. Never show who you are to anyone, ever.

"I need _help_ , Azrael. I'm... I might do something stupid, and risky, and I might get hurt or killed or- listen, i just need to know that... that you'll stand with me. Or, at least you wont stand _against_ me, not matter what."

Azrael was quiet for a long, long time. She seemed to be studying Lucifer, who was tapping almost every limb against whatever surface she could find, and there was a light humming in the back of her throat. The nervous tics were a mistake, she knew this, but she couldn't control them, not when Azrael was examining her like a controversial book.

"Hmm. Alright."

Lucifer almost laughed.

"Alright? _That's it?"_

Azrael shrugged, turning back to where she had been writing earlier.

"I trust you, Lucifer. I cannot promise everything, not my undying and immediant support, not when I have my country to think of... but I wont go against you, I promise."

Lucifer barely stopped herself from tackling her friend in a hug.

"Thank you, Azrael. I'll be going now-"

"Wait."

Azrael was grabbing her arm, now standing, and Lucifer could finally see the worry and concern in those great, dark eyes of hers. It felt both comforting and offputting, as she stood over her.

"Lucifer... this thing you're planning, this stupid, risky thing- it isnt... you will try to be safe, yes? You'll be smart about it? And- and you wont do anything bad... on purpose?"

She knew what she was asking. This was how people always asked- dancing around the question, too much of a coward to say "oh, Lucifer, I'm worried I cant leave you alone with any sharp objects because i think you might go just a tad insane and try and tear out your innards with them, please dont, alright?" But with Azrael, it felt different. It just... felt like she wasnt so overwhelming, so I-know-whats-best-for-you. She just felt concerned.

"I promise, Azrael, I'll be as safe as I can be with this. I know what I'm doing. You could say..."

"You could say I was _born_ to do this. That k was raised for this."

Azrael was confused, she didnt know what Lucifer meant, but she would. A sick part of Lucifer knew she would, even when Lucifer felt like she didn't even know what she was doing.

"Alright, then. Goodbye."

The Devil left the castle of Xasa confused, relieved, and somewhat grim but accepting.

It was time to plan.


	19. XIX

Lucifer didn't know what she was doing, not really. Michael clearly wanted her to take a stand- and on some level, Lucifer agreed. On a pretty big level, apparently, as she almost straight up told Azrael she was considering it.

But _considering_ was one thing, actually _fighting_ was another.

It wasn't like she didnt know how- quite the opposite. Her father drilled war strategies and tactics and manuvears into her head since he first noticed she enjoyed sparring with her older sister. She knew everything he did, all of his best plans for winning a fight. Michael was right, thanks to their father, she was probably the most militarily skilled divine in the current cycle.

But Cassius had an army. She had no one but herself at the moment.

Sure, she thought, stepping inside the castle, she could ask around. Try and get people to join- but would they? _Why_ would they? Fight and die in a bloody war, because she wanted them too? It was for a good cause- an extremely important cause- but Lucifer still couldn't stop her anxieties from wondering if anyone else besides her and Michael would believe that. Or believe she was even telling the truth, like Jesis.

"Your Highness! A package came from Heaven- it's from your sister, we thought you ought to know as soon as you came home!" The demon told her, guiding her attention to the box sitting neatly on the table. This servant was one of her current favorites, as she wasnt nearly as nervous around Lucifer as some others were. She reminded her of the servants she had grown up with, who were more like family to her than her own father.

"Thank you for telling me, I'll check it out right now." Lucifer walked over, wondering how Michael got it here so fast and why she would even send something right now. The box looked like something one would use for gifting a dress, and Michael had absolutely no reason to think Lucifer would be wanting new clothes when she was having a major moral dilemma over whether or not to stage a fucking revolution.

There it was, a small white box, wrapped in pale gold ribbon. Perfect, liked it had been done by a machine. On top of the gift was a piece of paper, a letter written to Lucifer.

 _"To Queen Lucifer,_  
_Sister, Me and Ariel recently found some old belongings of yours inside the House. I thought you may enjoy these, and perhaps you could find purpose for them in the near future._  
_I do hope you find them useful,_  
_Your Sister, Queen Michael Callidus Callistratus."_

Lucifer chuckled. Michael was nothing if not a stickler for being proper, and that fact rang through in how she wrote letters to people as close to her as her own sister. Setting the letter aside, Lucifer untied the ribbon and easily slid the top off the box.

Inside lay two pale white guns.

Lucifer hadn't seen those guns in years. Not since she had been very, very young and foolish and angry. They had been taken away from her long ago- she always had thought they had been returned to her aunt, or locked up in some secretive location, or some other permanent solution.

Not placed in a location so easy to find that her sisters simply stumbled upon them.

She picked one up, feeling the familiar weight and cool metal in her hands. Without thinking, she grasped it and aimed at the wall, visualizing the bullet's path and damage with ease in her mind. Lucifer grinned- she remembered first receiving the gift, becoming so overwhelmed with excitement.

"They are special, just for you, dear!" Her mother's sister had told Lucifer, handing her the two guns. "I heard you've become quite adept at sparring."

Enchanted, that's what she had called them. "They'll come to you when you call them- no matter where they are, isn't that just something?" Her aunt had worked with another skilled magician to do the spell, and the result was given to a young Lucifer, as if they weren't a pair of extremely valuable and powerful weapons, just placed in the hands of one very unstable teenager with a vendetta.

Not that they had known that, of course.

Lucifer was suddenly reminded of Michael's letter. She had told Lucifer that she hoped she would find them useful- that she hoped Lucifer could find a use for them. What peculiar phrasing she used, Lucifer thought.

The guns were a sign, a message, no doubt. Michael wanted her to fight, that much was clear.

But one fallen angel with two guns wasnt enough to bring down an entire army of Ancestors.

"Your Highness?"

Lucifer whipped around, confronted with the same demon as before.

"Are- are those the gifts?"

"Uh- um, yes. They're an old... gift, from a family member. Michael wanted me to have them again." The demon had looked nervous, and still did, but relaxed slightly at the explanation.

"Ah, I see."

She paused, shifting, eyes still locked on the guns the Queen's hands.

"...Why send them now?"

Lucifer placed them back in the box, sighing deeply.

"I- there's a lot happening right now, Afiel. A lot... there's a lot happening in Heaven, and there's a lot I may have to do." She made eye contact with the demon, staring directly at her, and Lucifer hoped it was more calming than unsettling. She had been told in the pass she either didnt make enough eye contact or made way too much, and she really didnt need that right then.

"Afiel... if I told you, and Hell, that something... something horrific was happening, something truly horrible, and I needed to fight it, and the fight was very dangerous... do you think anyone would care? Would want to fight with me?"

Afiel was silent for a long time. She stared at the ground, biting her lip. The room felt chokingly silent.

"I dont really know, Queen Lucifer, I can't speak for us all. But if this is really that important... if you truly believe in this..." She looked up, and stared directly at Lucifer. "Then please do it. I believe in you, I'm sure others do too."

Well, that was it was, she thought.

"Thank you, Afiel. That was very valuable advice."

  
She was really doing this.

"It was no problem, Your Highness. Good afternoon."

  
She sighed, turning to her room.

"Good afternoon, Afiel. And feel free to call me Lucifer."

  
Lucifer Callidus Callistratus was going to ignite a revolution against the Ancestors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT TOOK 19 CHAPTERS BUT THE PLOT HAS ARRIVED 
> 
> YEEHAW


	20. XX

The first thing Lucifer wanted to do after deciding on the Revolution was get _phenomenally_ wasted. That would have been. however, quite improper, and it would have been hard to convince people to fight Gods when she was drunk as Hell. Literally.

So, despite what she desperately wanted, she avoided alcohol for that night in exchange for planning out what exactly she was gonna do.

Lucifer hadn't been sleeping well recently, not since she had fallen. She had long since been used to sleeping under the light of the stars- when she was a fledgling, she flat-out refused to sleep if there were any other lights on. When the many storms blocked them out, she would toss and turn all night, unable to ever rest without them.

There were no stars in Hell. Besides the light that came through the holes in the ceiling, you couldn't see them- and you most certainly could not see them in Lucifer's windowless room. It was part of the reason she had been drinking so much; when she drank, she could sleep. Sure, the hangover it caused made her oversleep, but a small price to pay in exchange for actual rest.

But tonight, she had the perfect excuse not to sleep.

  
Lucifer stood at her table- her chair was still very much broken- and drew a quill and a sheet of paper from the drawers. Dipping it in ink, she wrote down:

  1. _Speak to the people about volunteering._



Lucifer felt very strongly about volunteering. She could, hypothetically, create a draft and make people fight- but the idea of anyone being forced to fight made her feel dizzy and horrible, so that was a huge, immediant no.

_2\. Get rid of the Ancestors in Hell._

_3\. Train volunteers in basic fighting._

_4\. Permantently remove Ancestors from Hell._

_5\. Go up to Heaven & declare war._

_Ah yes,_ she thought. _Genius ideas, Lucifer. Just find demons who want to volunteer for a suicide mission, train them extremely quickly, and then declare war on the Ancestors!_

She sat down, laying her head on the table.

_If I make it out of this, I can truly survive anything._

She thought about the post-declaration. What the everloving _fuck_ were they supposed to do then? The Ancestors would undoubtedly chase her, and then what? Kill her? Torture her? Kill and torture the _volunteers?_

_Fuck._

_6\. Die??_

Scratch.

_6\. Get horrifically maimed_

Scratch.

_6\. Tell Cassius it was all an elaborate prank._

Scratch.

 _How can I be this bad at this?_ She thought, reaching underneath to table to find a spare bottle of wine and relaxing against her desk.

After taking a sip (or five, or ten), Lucifer began thinking about the descent into Hell. It got so damn hot- literally- and so fast, you didnt even realize it until you were surrounded by red rock on all sides.

 _Bet the Ancestors will get a kick outta that when they come to kill me,_ Lucifer said to herself, taking another long sip.

_Wait._

_That's exactly it!_

Her army would be made of demons. And they could all use fire- she had seen it, they could summon fire with a snap of their fingers. It wouldn't take too much to get a wall of fire going- and even if any Ancestors tried to pass, any equems they have with them would not. Not to mention, Lucifer was damn fast. Partially her father's fault, as he would make her run laps until she passed out in the training field. She couldn't outrun them all forever, no way- but with enough motive, she could get all the way to Hell without getting caught.

It was worth a shot.

_6\. Run as fast as possible to Hell, and burn them with a wall of flames._

Lucifer could feel the pull of the sun within her chest, a feeling as old as time, telling her it was almost daytime. It had been a short day- literally, days and nights were fickle, and some could last only a few hours, while some never seemed to end- but she felt like it had been the most stressful yet.

And she had recently done a flaming free-fall from the sky.

She laid on the floor and closed her eyes. Images played behind her eyelids, of bloody war and death, all on her hands.

She also remembered the slaves in the fields of Eden, of Tariel and Iena, and knew that was already happening.

_When I wake up, she thought, it will never be the same._

She fell asleep, then, on the last day of her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> damb.... yeehaw ig!


	21. XXI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Theres a panic attack that involves mentions of self harm and possibly emetophobia (?)

 "Hello, there- may I talk to you all?"

   The first thing Lucifer had done after waking up was get dressed to look respectable- regal dress, cloak, the works- and head into town.

   The town was far different from Heaven, as inside of wide streets with huge houses, it was full of small alleys and fairly petite buildings. It was all packed extremely close, which was off putting to Lucifer, but still served her purposes well. The Ancestors would have a harder time tracking her throughout the thick of the city.

   Which brought her here, trying to look friendly and approachable and in no way suspicious, talking to a group of demons.

   "Oh, hello, Queen Lucifer." One of them said, a demon with a shaved head. "Of course you can, we aren't busy."

   The other two demons all nodded in agreement, shifting to face their leader. Lucifer began walking towards an alleyway between two larger buildings. She was rubbing her hands together, holding them behind her back.

   "Actually, if you could come over here?"

   The demons, confused, all followed, and Lucifer turned around to properly face them. Her face shifted to something far more serious.

   "I'm sorry, deeply, to spring this on you- I really am- but I'm afraid something terrible is going on, and I _really_ need assistance to deal with it."

   The shaved-head demon gasped, while the other two looked equally shocked.

   "Oh, your Highness, we'll gladly help in any way we can!" The shortest demon said, one with long hair tied at the waist.

   "Of course! What's the matter? Is there something wrong with Hell?" The third one piped up, a tall ethosein with a very short haircut.

   "No, no, no- well, _yes_ , actually, but it's not the only thing that's wrong." Lucifer bit her lip, pressing down the sick feeling of anxiety within her. "You see..."

   She leaned in close, dropping her voice down.

  "There's something horrible going on in Heaven, and I need to speak to the public about it- but I cannot do that with these Ancestors watching over Hell."

   "So you need us to help get rid of them, yes?" The long-haired one said. Lucifer smiled and nodded aggressively.

   "On one condition," the ethosein said, stepping in closer as Lucifer stood back up straight.

   "What _exactly_ is going on in Heaven?"

   Lucifer looked away, taking a deep breath. She knew this question would arise, and she prepared herself to explain.

   "Slavery."

   The demons, all three of them, grew extremely quiet. The silence stretched on and on, settling over the group of four like dust. It made Lucifer feel twitchy.

   "Oh." The long-haired one seemed painfully sad, and shocked. So did the rest.

    _How am I supposed to do this over and over? In front of anyone?_

   Before Lucifer could spiral into self-doubt once again, the shaved-head demon spoke up.

   "We'll get the An- er, we'll get the job done, your Highness. I promise." They stared straight at her, confident despite the fear lurking in their eyes. "And we'll be the first ones there afterwards to hear you speak."

   The other two demons nodded, assuring Lucifer in hushed voices they would do whatever was needed to get them out. She thanked them, and both Lucifer and the group stepped out, separating.

   "Hello, your Majesty."

   Lucifer whipped around. The group of demons had left, leaving Lucifer alone with an Ancestor.

   This particular one, one of three currently in Hell, was named Asmerdiel. He just felt nasty to talk to, like a puddle of goo that got very bitter and jealous one day and decides to form itself into something angel-shaped.

   Lucifer grinned, canines on full display.

   "Asmerdiel. How may I assist you?"

   The bastard smiled back, in a sickening way. He slinked toward her, all too confident in his movements, and it hit Lucifer that he certainly seemed to know something she didn't.

   "Oh, its nothing, your Highness- it's just..." He looked away dramatically, faking concern. "Your _father_ has heard you and your dear uxor, Jesis, have been having some nasty _spats_ , and he simply feels so _awful_ for you."

   At the mention of her father, something within Lucifer snapped, and she felt like she both wanted to violently sob at, and violently stab, Asmerdiel.

   "Oh?" Lucifer's teeth were gritted, her eyes staring dead into the Ancestors, in a move she knew for a fact was "terribly unnerving," as many had called it. "Believe me, everything is perfectly fine."

   Asmerdiel danced around Lucifer, walking in that smartass fashion that made him feel like some slithering, evil creature.

   "Oh, and I'm sure it is. Just wanted you to know, your Highness-"

   He was suddenly right by her ear, voice echoing around her head.

   "He is always watching over you."

   Asmerdiel said his goodbye and walked away, but Lucifer didn't notice. She didn't notice much. She just walked down some random alley, collapsed to her knees, and began gasping for air like she was being choked.

* * *

 

    _No, no not choked, please, I don't need those memories right now-_ she couldn't _breathe_ , why couldn't she _breathe_ , why did everything feel so hot and cold and sick-

   If Lucifer wasn't a divine being, and if it wasn't physically impossible for her to do so, she would have thrown up. As it was, she settled for violent coughing and gagging, trying to force out the sick feeling from her body.

    _It's like his hands are still here, gods he's everything, I'm never safe- I'm not safe- he's gonna kill me, he knows-_

   The fit continued, Lucifer shaking, gagging, banging her head and body on the walls around her as if breaking her skin could get rid of her Father's influence. As if draining herself of her blood could get rid of the parts of her that he created.

    _You'll never be free, you idiot, you should have known death wouldn't hold him back-_ **_god I can't breathe_ ** _, someone help me I'm gonna_ **_die here-_ **

    Lucifer passed out, briefly. When she woke up, she felt stiff and empty, and dragged herself out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Lucifer has a panic attack over her father, causing her to feel sick and self harm by hitting her head, before passing out. She wakes up and walks away.


	22. XXII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: mention of self harm, abuse/threats

Lucifer, who despite only being the celestial equivalent of a seventeen-to-eighteen year old, was quite used to waking up in alleyways, was nothing more than pissed off and somewhat sore after the whole thing.

It was clear the whole event was some sort of twisted intimidation tactic- so clearly, Cassius was onto her.

Lucifer ran a hand down her face, sighing. She looked around, wondering if she could find her way to Aamon's bakery again. She really needed an excuse to stay sober.

With a few directions from a friendly demon, she ended up outside of Aamon's Shop once again. She pushed open the door, immediately being greeted by the warm smells of spiced breads and cakes, along with few demons who were eating inside.

"Lucifer!" Aamon was cleaning off their hands and rushing out from behind the counter, eager to greet their Queen. Lucifer waved a hello. Aamon came to a quick halt when they got close.

"Oh-uh... your Highness, are you quite alright?"

"Ha. Nope!"

That was clearly _not_  the answer Aamon had bern expecting, and they quickly waved everyone out- saying there was "important business" happening, and they would be open tomorrow, but that everyone needed to leave. Some of the customers seemed perturbed, but the sight of Lucifer made them nod and quickly exit.

"Aamon? Why the fuck is everyone leaving?"

Coming out of the back room was a tall, thin demon, scruffy hair flopping over his face. He, like the customers, seemed pissed until he saw Lucifer, and then he was pissed and confused.

"Why's the Devil here?"

"She's... we're aquaintences, Nash." Aamon turned to Lucifer, looking apologetic. "He can leave if you want him to."

"Depends." Lucifer said, stalking up to "Nash" and glaring at him, leaning into his face. "Is he a fuckin' snitch?"

"No? I'd rather not get my ass kicked, thank you very much, your Highness."

"Not even if I'm talkin' mutiny? Rebellion? Treason against the Ancestors themselves?"

"Uh... Are you... alright, your Highness?"

Lucifer sighed, throwing herself down on a nearby chair.

"No. My life sucks, I'm planning a rebellion with no support and the Ancestors hate me. And I'm fuckin' tired."

"You're _WHAT?_ " Aamon and Nash both yelled in unison.

Lucifer was quickly beginning to question her decision to come here and not just go straight home and deal with things her usual way.

"Rebellion. Against my father. Y'know, a horrific man, slave owner, generally one of the worst beings in existence." Lucifer grabbed a random drink and chugged it, before sliding down even more in her seat.

"O-oh." Aamon said, trying to stay calm. Nash was taking a different route, staring wide-eyed at the demon as if she had actually just gone mad in front of them.

Maybe she had.

"May I ask... why?" Aamon asked, sitting down across from her.

"Yeah, what the _fuck_ , Lucifer?"

Lucifer sighed deeply, holding the bridge of her nose.

  
"You two have to swear to me, on everything, you _won't_ be telling anyone unless I tell you that you can." She stuck out her hand, magic pouring out from it.

The other two demons shared a look, but shook their Queen's hand one after the other, feeling the power of the promise run through them in turn. They were bound to it now- and that was secure enough for Lucifer, no need for threats.

"Alright," she said, sitting up to stare at the two of them. "Let's break this down."

It took a bit of time, the pair of demons were more-or-less caught up on the tragic events of the past couple of days. Lucifer was very clearly avoiding eye contact- the words "my Father hurt me" had left her mouth and had she not been chest-deep in dissociation and exhaustion, she would have had a panic attack immediantly. Over a thousand years of painful conditioning will do that to you.

As Lucifer stared aggresively down at the floor, Aamon and Nash stared at her, in shock and horror, and feeling too sick and scared to speak.

Nash, apparently, was not actually stopped by that, or any possible notion of "politeness."

"Wait, so your father- he _hit_  you? Like, frequently?"

At this point, Lucifer was done. She had hit her breaking point- the Rebellion decision, the recruiting, Asmerdiel, actually _confessing_ her biggest secret to two people in the past, what, /three days?/

Lucifer let out a manic laugh, feeling her eyes fill up despite her best efforts.

"Oh, believe me, kid-" she took a shuddering breath. "He did a _l_ _ot worse than hit me._ "

Nash immediantly shut up.

It's important to note that to a divine being, abuse was just- not really spoken of. Not because they ignored it, but because it just didn't / _happen_ / often. Any type of abuse- physical, sexual, emotional- was one of the only offenses that Divine Law was merciless about. Theft, assault- even murder- could be pardoned, depending on it's motive. But abuse meant you would get prosecuted mercilessly.

There weren't many stories of abuse. Especially ones as bad as Lucifer's case.

Lucifer, Michael- their Mother- they could have told someone, many times- but growing up being threatened had a heavy toll. It was always weighing on their minds- _tell anyone and I'll kill you._

Eventually, Cassius realized that it was far more effective to tell the two eldest, / _tell anyone and I'll kill your siblings._

So, one could say that Nash and Aamon were quite unprepared for dealing with this.

And it didn't help that Lucifer was currently laughing to- or at- herself, and spiraling into hyperventilation.

"Oh- oh, your Highness, I-" Aamon's hand fluttered around the curled up form of the Devil quite unsure of how exactly to handle this. Nash backed up, scared of somehow making all this worse- and he wasn't exactly the best at _emotion_.

"I-I'm fine, Aamon- rea-really!" Lucifer insistes between gasps for air. "J-just... ne-never told anyo-one. B-before."

"No offense, your Highness, but you really don't seem _fine._ " Aamon insisted. Lucifer just laughed.

"Yeah, yeah, I-I'm lying. I do that a lo-lot." She sat up again, wiping her face furiously as the two demons stared on. "B-but that's what comes with... with being f-forced to, I suppo-ose. Anyways..."

"What do you mean?"

"I-I-I'd rather not talk about it, Nash- I've already spoken way more than I wanted to on the s-subject."

"Oh," Nash said softly, and Aamon drew their hand back as Lucifer stood up, wiping her face and forcing a smile. She really hated the whole "panic disorder" business she'd been born with, it was annoying and inconvenient. She reached into her jamasotam for one of her prescription cigarettes, popping one in her mouth and blowing out, the end immediately sparking up. She took a drag and sighed.

"Anyways... I really should be going. Revolutions to plan, treason to commit, you know how it is."

Lucifer moved to leave, but Aamon quickly grabbed her arm.

"Wait," they said, withdrawing quickly. "One last thing before you go."

Aamon set a small basket of treats in her hand, smiling sadly at her. Nash stood by.

"You should... you should really tell Hell about this. It's a good argument, if you can prove it."

Lucifer simply laughed and thanked them, and stepped outside.

"Tell them," she laughed to herself. "Tell them... what an idea."

She walked through the streets of Hell, shaking her head.

"Tell 'em what? That my father is a maniacal criminal obsessed with war?" She scoffed, taking a drag of the cigarette. Her breathing slowed further as the smoke settled in her body. "I've spent my whole life doing exactly _not_  that. Huh."

She paused to lean against a nearby wall, basket floating beside her. She looked down at her wrist.

With a thought, the life-long glamour faded, exposing her true skin beneath it. The criss-crossed lines, scars of varying lengths and depths- on long horizontal one, that rose above the rest. Not all of them had been made by Lucifer herself-

But many were. Most were, at least on this part.

_No one has ever seen them. No one outside of the house._

She'd been wearing a glamour for her entire life. Since Cassius had started.

_You're covered in them. A waste of that pretty face the public loves so much._

Her mother had taught her how to make her own when she was so young. So that she could keep it on indefinitely.

_What would they say if they saw you? The real you? What would they think of you?_

Not even Moz had seen them. She didn't even know the half of it- she had been there through all of it, and she didn't even _know._

_Maybe they'd be disgusted. Who would they be disgusted by more, though? The man who broke skin first and drove you to it, or the disfigured child who did so many awful things-_

But wouldn't that be it, though? Who wouldn't be disgusted, horrified by a person who's body is covered entirely by scars?

Who wouldn't believe Cassius owned slaves after seeing what he was capable of to his own child?

The glamour melded back together, scars fading into nothingness. Lucifer continued om back to her castle, silent and thoughtful.


End file.
